Category: Writing Craft

Why Your Main Character Falls Flat: Do They Think About the “Big Questions” of Life?

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Sometimes beta readers and reviewers say things like “I just didn’t resonate with the main character” or “The protagonist was nothing special,” despite the many hours and years you’ve spent paining over every one of their thoughts, choices, and words.

So what makes some characters feel forgettable, while others move the hearts of generations of readers? The fact is, characters need more than a driving goal, intricate backstory, and unique strengths and weaknesses in order to truly feel alive. A good horse has most of those things.

If you want your mc to feel deeper than an animal, they need to ponder and act upon matters of “eternal significance,” whether they fall on the side of good or evil. Let’s look at how and why:

  1. The go-to character development checklist doesn’t cut it
  2. What’s missing from “flat” characters?
  3. The few “big questions” most characters do ask
  4. Why they’re not enough
  5. Rebuttal 1: “Peasants aren’t deep.”
  6. Rebuttal 2: “Teenagers aren’t deep.”
  7. Rebuttal 3: “SFF isn’t/doesn’t need to be literature.”
  8. Rebuttal 4: “Morals can be shown through emotions.”

The go-to character development checklist doesn’t cut it

When fleshing out a character, particularly the main protagonist, authors have a list of elements they (should) develop:

  • Deepest want or need
  • Backstory
  • Strengths
  • Weaknesses
  • Likes and dislikes
  • Unique behavioral patterns or personality traits (quirks)
  • Style of speech

These are all important and go a long way in helping readers root for and emotionally connect to a character. But they are still pretty surface level. They’re the bones and muscles, but readers still need the heart and soul.

With the exception of the “deepest desire” or any hidden traumas, you probably know all of those things about your coworkers. Their career and family goals, where they grew up, whether they prefer coffee or soda, if they’re a morning person or obsessed with x sports team, and a whoooole list of weaknesses! 😉

But does this make you feel close to them? Do you really know your coworkers even if you are familiar with their irritating and endearing manners of speech and their drama with their in-laws?

Even if they are the type to gush too much information and you do learn their greatest goals and personal traumas, would you be able to say you “truly” know them?

What’s missing from “flat” characters?

You know the joke (that’s unfortunately not a joke at all): don’t discuss politics or religion at Christmas dinner.

Noticeably absent in workplace and family small talk AND the above character checklist, are topics of “eternal significance.” Do you know what your coworker thinks and feels about the big questions in life? Have you written your main character in a way that will make your reader understand what they believe about what is good, true, and beautiful in the world? Or with only enough depth that readers will know your characters as well as a coworker.

Let’s take a step back. Do your characters actually consider these things? Do they have a well developed inner moral compass, ideology, and active mental world? For some characters, ambivalence is actually part of who they are. Perhaps part of their developmental arc involves learning how to care about more than just themselves. But if you have not deliberately written your character to be shallow, then you need to deliberately develop their spiritual and intellectual world, not just their emotional and plot-relevant one.

Now, let me say straight off that there’s a difference between being shallow and being uneducated. Many fantasy main characters begin as average peasants. Medieval farmers didn’t have much opportunity to learn philosophy or art history. That doesn’t mean they can’t consider meaningful questions and cultivate a life of virtue according to their values.

  • Where do we come from? What happens when we die?
  • What truly makes life meaningful?
  • Should I seek to make the world a better place or merely live as if there’s no tomorrow?
  • Is there any point to choosing good in such a terrible world?

Real people have opinions on almost everything. There’s always a deeper ideology underneath every quirk.

Your character may find embellished clothing distasteful and dress beneath their means as a result. What’s their underlying deeper held truth? A lingering resentment for the wasteful indulgences of the wealthy? Discomfort in their own body and self-image? Subconscious prejudice against the foreign styles that have started to dominate their culture?

Do you know the answer to that question? Does your character?

A stoic, determinedly plain hero is a trope. We get a sense of who and what they are, but not why or how. As a result, they come across the same as every other purposely understated hero in fiction. This behavior does not end up setting them apart, because the details are only surface level.

For a character to truly have complex depth, they need to think and care about significant moral, social, political, and religious topics, AND act according to the conclusions they have drawn.

The few “big questions” most characters do ask

Now, a lot of main characters in sci-fi and fantasy do address “big questions,” but usually only the same handful:

  1. The right way to treat your fellow human
  2. The morality of killing
  3. How the powerful should treat those beneath them (essentially their philosophy of governance)
  4. The existence of a higher power

Fantasy heroes almost always have to decide where they fall on the lawful good to chaotic evil chart, where they draw the line in their efforts to defeat their enemies, what type of rulers they will follow or stand against, and if a greater spiritual or magical power impacts their life.

I rarely see any moral or philosophical insights beyond these 4 topics.

  1. Do I toss a coin to the street orphan or ignore them?
  2. Should I kill the villain or not? Can I torture him first or not?
  3. Am I honoring my oath more by supporting the peasant revolt or the authority of the local noble who was a family ally?
  4. When my loved ones die, will I see them again in Valhalla or not?

We also usually see the mc’s practical opinions on sex and relationships.

Why they’re not enough

The topics of life and death, power and rulership, God and the afterlife, and moral behavior may seem to give your story and character depth. But if you stop to think about it, these questions are really very basic.

A 10 year old asks them:

  1. Should I be nice or a jerk?
  2. Can I hit someone to stop them from hitting my sister?
  3. Is it ok for teachers to be mean to students?
  4. Is God real?

I rarely encounter main characters in modern fiction whose view is any more refined than that of a ten year old. Another assassin who has nightmares about those he’s killed. Another paladin who pains over whether to stand against the tyrant king he was meant to serve. Another spunky farm girl who refuses to be sold off in marriage by her callous relatives.

Adding other character details like “she obsessively loves potatoes” or “he makes really terrible puns all the time” will make a character feel a bit more unique. But it’s still like adding trimmings to white bread. There is little substance at the heart of such characters.

It’s almost jarring reading older fiction and seeing how differently characters used to be written. Characters would regularly and casually discuss matters of great significance on a wide range of topics – art and music, foreign engagement, social dynamics and etiquette, what makes a superstition legitimate or folly, etc. They clearly have a deeply developed mental (and often spiritual) world that actually affects their day to day existence.

They aren’t the type of people who, when asked a question about people, God, the world, politics, money, stories, or really anything, would shrug and say, “who cares?” or “whatever” rather than pausing to think about it and align their choices accordingly.

Rebuttal 1: “Peasants aren’t deep.”

Now, I admit that older novels were almost predominantly written by and about the middle and upper classes (Austen, Defoe, Dumas, Lewis). The 3 older books that I recently read, and which struck me in their moral and intellectual depth, are The Railway Children by Edith Nesbit, A Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde, and The Man Who Was Thursday by G.K. Chesterton. All are about members of the British middle and upper classes.

That’s one reason why Charles Dickens, Mark Twain, Victor Hugo, and Harriet Beecher Stowe were so hugely impactful. For the first time, authors started writing from the perspective of the (very) poor, and showed them to have deeply valuable lives and richly developed character and beliefs, irrelevant of their opportunity or education.

A fantasy or sci-fi novel that follows a farmer, scrapper, or orphan can still contain complex ideas, rich moral underpinnings, and discussions that peel back layers of the human condition.

Rebuttal 2: “Teenagers aren’t deep.”

Young adult books, and YA characters specifically, have gained a reputation for being somewhat shallow, if entertaining, flashes in the pan. Fun to read, but with little staying power. The mc’s tend to be impetuous, emotional teenagers who are often designed as “reader inserts,” deliberately lacking any true distinguishing features.

So you might be thinking, “it’s not that SFF doesn’t have deep characters. It’s that YA SFF doesn’t – so go read adult fiction.”

It’s true that teenagers haven’t had as much time to develop “life wisdom” and their hormones might be driving them to think that their crush smiling at them is “the meaning of life.” We’re not getting married at 15 anymore, so we aren’t in as much of a rush to wise up. But that doesn’t mean young adults should be portrayed as predominantly insolent, impulsive, horny twerps who happen to be able to save the world.

That’s insultingly reductive. A lot of juvenile fiction from the 20th century shows children with a far more developed moral compass and uprightness of character than 21st century books about teenagers. And plenty of the characters in modern adult fiction feel like empty shells. Youth guarantees vapidity no more than age assures wisdom.

Rebuttal 3: “SFF isn’t/doesn’t need to be literature.”

You may also protest, “but fantasy is meant to be entertaining! If you want deep topics, go read serious literature.” Except I vehemently disagree that fantasy and science fiction cannot be “serious literature.” Just take a look at some of the most enduring and impactful books of all time: the Bible, Homer, Shakespeare, Brave New World, fairy tales, H.G. Wells, and so on. All contain spiritual and speculative elements.

This doesn’t need to be a case of “either/or:” depth of content does not eliminate entertainment value. Homer and Shakespeare were both the “Hollywood” of their day. The reason they have endured is because they’re epic, hilarious, fun AND meaningful.

So yes, I expect more of fantasy and sci-fi books today. I look for more in their protagonists. Because fantastical stories have the capacity to catch and hold the imagination of the world for millennia.

Rebuttal 4: “Morals can be shown through emotions.”

It’s perhaps worth noting that the way many define and develop their ideology and morality has changed significantly over the past few decades alone. With the rise of postmodernism came the belief that right and wrong is “whatever you want it to be.”

Modern individuals often choose their actions and beliefs based off how they feel, rather than through a pattern of philosophy or religion. So authors may think, “but I am showing what my characters believe – by showing how they feel and how they act on those feelings – not by lengthy discussions or periods of introspection.”

Unacceptable. Civilizations cannot stand upon a cloud of morals precipitated by fleeting feelings. Postmodernism is a fundamentally self-contradictory religion. It essentially gives people permission to be shallow – nothing but mammals. Why think about anything significant? Just go along with what you want in the moment. I’ve read stories about literal animals (Watership Down, The Tale of Despereaux, Redwall, Warriors, Mistmantle) who deal with matters of eternal significance more than many contemporary human characters.

Characters who side with the slave revolt because they feel angry about cruelty are no “deeper” than characters who don’t care but side with the slave revolt for money. Why is it wrong? “Because I don’t like it…” What if they start liking it? Does that suddenly make it right?

If your characters just let themselves be blown whichever way suits them, whether for money, survival, or the self-satisfaction of their feelings, then they are certainly no different from many humans, but since when did we start writing stories about “just any” humans?

This isn’t grade school where everyone gets a participation trophy for being average. People write memoirs about exceptional people, or about everyday people who chase after something exceptional. Memoirs about lackluster Joe Schmoe wouldn’t sell, so why do authors think fantasy books about lackluster Joen Sch’moex should?

To be called a hero, to deserve being the main subject of a tale, your characters need to pursue the values, ideas, and dynamics in life that make us more than animals.

If beta readers and reviewers keep saying things like “I just didn’t relate to this character” or “The mc wasn’t really memorable” consider taking a deep look at your mc’s mental and spiritual pillars – then build them deeper and higher!

Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.

I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!

Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…

11 Problems with Multiple Point of View Characters That I See as a Book Editor

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Books with multiple (3+) points of view (POV) have become increasingly popular in the past couple decades, especially in massive fantasy epics and sci-fi. But there are multiple problems with this style that I commonly encounter as a book editor.

The technique is not wrong in and of itself. Every method of storytelling comes with its own pitfalls. The practice of writing novels with multiple points of view in third person is still relatively new, so authors have had fewer exceptional, “classic” examples upon which to base their style.

Now that editors have a larger body of work to analyze, it’s our job to guide authors to improve the way they tell their stories. So I’ll explain these top 11 problems that I see in manuscripts (and published books) with multiple points of view, and offer suggestions for how to avoid them:

  1. Difficulty hooking readers
  2. Skewed story pacing
  3. Skewed chapter pacing
  4. Ruined cliffhangers
  5. Diminished mystery
  6. Harmed character dynamics
  7. Characters as cameras
  8. Likeability wars
  9. Exhausting to read
  10. Lazy writing
  11. More is less
  12. Tips for writing multi-POVs well

I’ll be expanding each point into a full article with more detailed advice on how to avoid each pitfall in your own writing. Part 1: Harder to Hook is already complete – stay tuned for the full series!

1. Difficulty Hooking Readers

With every major point of view character, authors must check off all the same boxes: establish the status quo, show the individual’s wants and needs, give readers a reason to root for them, and spark off their story with an inciting incident.

With only one POV, authors can achieve many of these benchmarks within the first few chapters. This period of time is vital to securing reader interest. If you can’t catch them within this time, most readers will stop reading.

But with each new POV, authors wipe the reader’s emotional slate clean and start all over again. Readers may be interested at the end of the first chapter, but suddenly they’re faced with another stranger that vies for their investment all over again. Then a third. God forbid 4 or more.

It could take an hour of reading to get back to the first character, at which point all the emotional tension has faded and readers have to restart in their efforts to connect with the character.

If a reader only has the mental energy to read 3 chapters, a book with 1 POV has an advantage. 3 chapters is enough time for a reader to build a solid emotional connection to one character. On the other hand, if each of the first 3 chapters is written from a different perspective, after the same amount of reading time, that reader will only have just met each character, not had enough time to get to know them much at all.

How to avoid this problem: As an editor, I find that it’s more effective to group multiple chapters from 1 POV together rather than switching every chapter. It lets readers more deeply immerse themselves in one character before moving on.

Read more about how multiple POVs affect the opening hook of a novel in my full article.

2. Skewed Story Pacing

This is THE biggest problem I encounter in books with multiple point-of-view characters – messed up pacing at the book-wide level.

Say you have 3 POV characters – you’re basically writing 3 books at once and combining them into the same package. This means you’re asking your readers to endure a first act that’s three times as long as usual.

Often, the first act is the least interesting part of a story. In sci-fi and fantasy in particular, there’s often a lot of travel and exposition about the world, races and species, magic system, etc.

Readers are waiting for the moment when something changes. But with three characters, they have to wade through 3 times as much “intro content” before they get to the “interesting stuff.”

A first act usually takes up about the first third of a book. So reading the first act of a book with 3 POVs can feel the same as reading the length of an entire book that only contains first act content.

This is especially problematic if all of the characters have extremely similar situations. For instance, one farm boy trekking across the country to live out his destiny can be repetitive enough, let alone if all your mc’s start out as average joes who undertake a long journey.

How to avoid this problem: Choose POV characters whose arcs complement and contrast one another, rather than being too repetitive or seemingly unrelated (e.x. on opposite sides of the world and won’t meet for several books). Don’t be afraid to introduce some POVs much later in the book or series.

3. Skewed Chapter Pacing

Pacing is most obviously affected at the larger story level, but also at the chapter level. Often, writers are advised to “start late and end early,” but I find that books with many POVs both start and end their chapters too early.

Every time an author switches POV there is a “reset” of sorts. They need to reestablish where the character is, what they’ve been doing since the last time the reader followed them, and how much time has passed.

As a result, the start of each chapter can feel slow and exposition heavy. It’s difficult to use en media res if it’s been 100 pages since your reader last saw this character. It can take a while to build back up to a higher level of energy or greater level of intellectual and emotional intimacy.

But then, because the pacing of these books can feel bloated, authors try to end their chapters on a “snappy” note to avoid boring their readers. So they choose to end a scene too early, sometimes in the middle of the conflict they spent an entire chapter building towards.

This can leave readers feeling like “things were just getting good again” when the POV changed, resetting everything all over again!

How to avoid this problem: If you’re worried that readers won’t push through the next 100 pages unless you end a beat too early every time, you need to face the larger problem – whether that content should actually be trimmed. Authors have learned effective tactics to keep people binge-reading. But that won’t keep readers from noticing – after they’ve put down the book – that they didn’t actually enjoy “getting through” a lot of the in-between content, even though they felt compelled to continue in the moment.

4. Ruined cliffhangers

But multi-POVs even ruin the effectiveness of these cliffhangers!

The more POVs you have, the longer it’ll take to cycle through them all, and the more the emotion and energy will have diminished by the time you get back to your original character.

If you end a chapter on a cliffhanger, and then switch to a second POV, then a third, then a fourth, by the time you return to the original characters, days or weeks could have passed!

Consider: Character A’s companion betrays them. Enemies surround them. CUT. …3 chapters later, we return to character A, sitting in a dungeon. We didn’t get to see their decision to surrender, the gloating of their enemies, their rage and hurt while the betrayal was most fresh, or the horror of their first few days of imprisonment.

In such situations, authors break an implicit promise to readers: “the wait will be worth it.” A cliffhanger draws readers along because they can’t wait to see what happens next. But when time skips are necessary to facilitate more POVs, readers often don’t get to see the content they most anticipated.

Readers can start to feel like authors are just stringing them along with sensational chapter endings – and if you lose reader trust, you’re one step away from losing them completely.

How to avoid this problem: Use cliffhangers sparingly and make sure the interim chapters don’t conflict with the energy you’ve built. If character A is facing a threat to their life, while characters B and C are sitting in meetings, readers will be tempted to just skip ahead to get back to character A (I’ve done this).

5. Diminished Mystery

Mystery is one of the most compelling storytelling techniques an author can use. Humans are curious! But when an author shows readers the perspectives of characters from many sides of a conflict, we don’t have to wonder at their motivations or plots anymore.

If we don’t know what’s happening on the other side of the world, in the mind of a love interest, or to a missing character, every attempt the POV character makes to uncover information is packed with greater stakes. Readers turn the pages eagerly, desperate to find out more. There are false trails, relationship blunders, and a growing pressure to discover the answer to our questions.

Imagine if Dumbledore also had POV in Harry Potter – a legitimate choice. After all, in Ender’s Game, Orson Scott Card shows Ender’s superiors planning how best to manipulate him – readers see what’s happening before Ender does. But if Rowling had made this choice, her books would have lost a huge element of mystery!

Not every book needs to focus on this element. But fantasy readers love unlocking the secrets of massive worlds through the eyes of their favorite characters!

How to avoid this problem: Don’t sacrifice character realism to avoid redundancy. Is it “in character” for person A to spend a lot of time investigating x? Don’t reveal that information through person B if you will have to cut it from person A’s POV, thereby harming their plot and character arc.

6. Harmed Character Dynamics

This same problem affects character development. People talk about their experiences with each other – it’s necessary for relationships to grow. But if readers have already seen something happen to character B, the author might not bother to show character A asking about it.

This often results in a lack of important scenes that we really should see. We want to see one of our leads shocked by the other’s traumatic past, or laughing uproariously at their embarrassing mistakes. But if the reader has already seen these moments, they’re usually summarized in passing, since a joke isn’t as funny a second time around.

This can be even more problematic if a party of friends separates and then reconnects later, but never talks about their respective experiences. It’s just skipped over as though it doesn’t matter, when going over that kind of emotion is very important to relationships.

Example 1:

For instance, in the epilogue of Brandon Sanderson’s Words of Radiance [character names redacted to avoid spoilers ahead], we discover that a character we thought died in book 1 is actually alive. It’s a tantalizing reveal for only the readers – none of the main cast knows yet. In book 3, this character makes it back to their family’s base. A servant runs ahead and announces the character’s return, everyone is shocked, then the scene cuts.

There is then a time skip! The actual reunion happens off-page!

Since the author already revealed the character’s survival to the readers, everyone else’s surprise has little emotional impact on the reader. What we have been waiting to see is everyone else’s messy emotions – joy, confusion, tears, asking about what happened.

We see none of that. Chapters later, Sanderson gives an exposition dump about how people responded and what they’re still feeling.

I find more and more that books with multiple POVs skip scenes like this. Too often, group scenes are used to move the plot ahead, and the author forgets to linger on the important emotional moments that lead to character development and deeper relationships.

Example 2:

That’s exactly what happened in the first Avengers movie. I’d been imagining for months what these characters might say to each other when they finally met – how they’d joke with each other, what questions they’d ask, if any would challenge each other to a friendly spar. Unfortunately, for the sake of time, the movie skipped right over such moments and went straight to a briefing room – the plot dump. It was as if the characters already knew each other or had nothing important to say to each other.

I wanted to see Tony and Captain America talk about his father, Thor look befuddled and amused that a human accidentally turned himself into a green monster, and their sidekicks eye each other with “thank god there’s another sane person in the room” looks. I remember being devastatingly disappointed when none of this came up. As if because viewers already know about Cap’s connection to Tony’s father, and because Tony must have read Steve’s file off-screen, that there would be no point in them discussing it. On the contrary, I think that would have been a far more emotionally rewarding moment than the terse conversations we did see between them.

How to avoid this problem: Is your story so long that you have to cut “heartfelt” scenes in favor of barreling the plot along? If the number of your POVs is forcing you to sacrifice character moments for time, you probably have too many. If your characters primarily come together for the sake of plot rather than dynamics that change their lives, then you may be forgetting what truly makes a story touch hearts.

7. Characters as Cameras

Using characters as cameras is a travesty. More and more, I see cutaway chapters that use the eyes of a random character as a way to dump plot info. We never see these characters again. They don’t matter. The author merely uses them as a lens through which to view an important event.

This tactic ignores one of the core tenants of storytelling! Events are important because of who they are about and who they affect, more so than because of what happens. You need to answer “why should we care?” I’d rather see the main character’s reaction to hearing that his King was assassinated than see the event through the eyes of one of the royal guards.

The adage “show don’t tell,” has been taught incompletely, leaving authors feeling like anything that happens must be shown on the page in the form of a scene. That’s not true. Exposition is a useful tool.

It’s easy to get caught in the allure of sensationalism. Authors might think readers will find it boring to hear about the event later, rather than seeing the death “on screen.” But the opposite can be true. Action for the sake of action isn’t necessarily compelling, but the emotional reaction of a character you care about is.

How to avoid this problem: Remember that just because you have imagined a scene, doesn’t mean that readers needs to see it that way. When you know the details, the readers will feel deep layers within the story. Don’t use characters as a vehicle for plot. Use plot as a vehicle to show who your characters are.

8. Likeability Wars

Readers will always have their favorites and least favorites. It’s frustrating to switch from an emotionally compelling character to a POV that feels comparatively flat or purposeless. The comparison can make readers begin to resent other parts of the book, as though they’re getting in the way of letting them enjoy the part of the story they’re actually invested in.

Personally, I often “check out” a little during POVs I don’t care for, essentially skimming through them to get back to “the good stuff.” I read just enough to get the gist of the plot so I can keep up with “the real story.”

Now, I’d never counsel an author not to include a character because some readers won’t like them – you should write the story you love and want to tell.

But the fact remains that readers will drop a book because of how annoying it is to wait a long time to cycle back to their favorite character. I sure have.

How to avoid this problem: Readers can tell the difference between characters you love, and ones you added because you felt like the plot or story needed them. I often see this with books that have a couple male mc’s and then throw in a female POV too. If you aren’t in love with your character, how can you expect readers to be?

9. Exhausting to Read

Reading books with multiple POVs, especially ones with 6 or more, can feel like a slog! It’s a lot of information to keep track of and can feel more like reading a travelogue or worldbuilding encyclopedia than a story.

In my experience, even people who love these kinds of books (Malazan, GOT, WOT) talk as though reading them is an exercise in perseverance. More readers seem to love these books despite their multiple POVs than because of them.

I’ve never heard a person say, “wow, it was groundbreaking for George R.R. Martin to write from 7 POVs. What a great way to tell the story – it just had to be done that way. It would have been way less enjoyable otherwise!” No. Fans commiserate with each other about how tough it was to get through them.

Some of Robert Jordan’s top fans (I regularly attend JordanCon) talk about how there are 3 WHOLE BOOKS in the middle of the series that you “just have to get through and then it gets good.” Do you want your readers to talk like that one day?

How to avoid this problem: Kurt Vonnegut famously said, “pity the reader.” Reading can already feel like hard work. We open up our minds and emotions to new experiences, often after a long day at work. So please, authors, will you pity us a little? Would you want to read a book that’s written like yours?

10. Lazy Writing

Sometimes a large number of POV characters feels like lazy writing on the part of authors.

They have such large worlds with so many characters, that’s it’s easiest to just plop them all in, like throwing every kid who wants to play into a soccer game, rather than picking the ones that make the best team and benching the rest. It’s true that sidelining characters you love doesn’t feel good, and it can be hard to determine which cast will result in the best version of your story.

But it is necessary – just because an idea or character “feels right,” doesn’t mean it should make the final cut.

Writing instructors have been known to say that nothing should be included in a story unless its exclusion would make the readers lose something. Does it have to be there? Would the story and character be lesser without it?

How to avoid this problem: Test various combinations of POVs. Offer different versions to beta readers. Cut, rewrite, repeat. A skilled carpenter will test out multiple types of wood, carving methods, and finishes before settling on a style for a major piece. Are you treating your writing this seriously?

11. More is Less

In books with many POVs, sometimes characters and plot arcs lose a little something with each added main character. Like trying to spread a small amount of butter over 10 pieces of bread rather than 2, the “energy” in a story can only disperse among so many characters.

This is especially true if you have written characters with similar archetypes or plots – their stories can start to feel repetitive. For instance, She Would be King follow 3 black young adults who escape slavery or abuse, see their mother die, and then go on a journey to Liberia. By the time I got to the third mother’s death, which occurred in almost identical circumstances as the second one’s, I was emotionally worn out. Each story on its own would have been powerful, but together, they impaired each other.

Books with multiple POVs are ambitious – the more characters you use, the harder it will be for you to connect them all together in a way that makes the total greater than the sum of its parts.

How to avoid this problem: Think of writing as like knitting a sweater. It’s easier to create a classy pattern with 2-3 colors, but when you try to combine 10 different colors, things can start to look like a kid’s crayon project. Be deliberate about your “pattern” from the start. Too often it’s obvious that the author got weary of trying to balance their POVs and left the story feeling like a tangled heap of yarn.

Tips for Writing Multi-POVs Well

Often, less is more. I encourage you to ask whether you have too many main characters and whether your story would be tighter and more compelling if you trimmed some of them. That is what some stories need.

Of course, not all books with multiple POVs have these issues.

And POV is also a matter of personal preference. Many readers and publishers seek out books with multiple point of view characters. If this is your chosen style, then your next step is to make your writing as strong as possible and avoid the most common pitfalls.

Here are some ways to test whether you have too many POV characters.

Questions to ask yourself:

  • Would character A’s journey be more interesting if the readers didn’t know what was happening with character B?
  • Are all of these characters emotionally compelling to me, or am I writing from their perspective because they are the logical choice for depicting plot in a certain part of the world/story?

Questions to ask your beta readers:

This is extremely important, but many authors are too hesitant to ask tough questions of their beta readers. Understandable – our books are our babies! But it’s better to know if one of your characters is boring or insufferable to readers before you publish, than to find out in your reviews.

  • Were you invested in all the POV characters?
  • Which ones were most and least compelling to you?
  • Are there any characters you thought were unnecessary or detracted from the story?
  • At any point, did it feel like a slog to get through the book?
  • Did these stories feel vitally intertwined or like separate books crammed into one?

Some beta reader feedback will be subjective, so it’s important to ask enough beta readers that you start to see commonalities in their responses. Then you will be able to approach rewrites with more confidence that your changes will improve your story for all readers, rather than for the preferences of a few.

Happy writing and stay tuned for the expanded version of each point – I know the tips I gave above are pretty vague, but I’ll expand them in future posts!

Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.

I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!

Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…

Write Me “Boy Books”: Letter From a Book Editor

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Princes and strategists, martial champions and war heroes, grit, sweat, brawls, and schemes. Since the beginning of time, we have told stories about the best and worst of men – from myths and epics, to action and adventure classics, to modern superheroes and fantasy rogues, such stories have touched hearts across language barriers and millennia.

So why are they hard to find on bookshelves today?

Let’s take a look at the modern publishing market, reader tastes, and my own perspective as a book editor (plus a few obligatory caveats):

  1. I love reading boy books
  2. Big publishers don’t want boy books – they’re wrong
  3. What I’m NOT saying
  4. Write boy books!

I love reading boy books

These are 8 of my favorite books of all time. Notice any commonalities?

Artemis Fowl cover: stylized to look like a leather bound tome with clasps along the spine and a lock at its edge. Foreign runes are stamped beneath the title.
Theft of Swords cover: two cloaked men stand side by side in a battle against knights, one tall and bulky, the other short and slender.

All of these stories are about men (and boys) – clever, dangerous, heroic, stalwart men. Some are written for general audiences, while others go all in on the “bro vibes.”

Each tale contains passion and violence, loyalty and steadfast friendships, promises broken and kept, strategic and psychological contests, and a mix of wit and heartbreak. The ones that have stood the test of centuries reveal great truths about the human condition.

There’s something else I’ll point out though. The most recently published of these 8, Virtuous Sons (read my review) and Theft of Swords, were both self-published first, and only picked up by publishers after finding great success. The same is true of the wildly popular Cradle series by Will Wight and the Dungeon Crawler Carl series by Matt Dinniman.

2 more of my favorites, The Hands of the Emperor by Victoria Goddard (read my review) and Paranoid Mage by InadvisablyCompelled, have continued to gain momentum as self-published works.

It’s not like we have a net shortage of books about boys and men – that’s the majority of what’s been published for all of human history. But, naturally, modern readers gravitate toward books written in a modern voice – we want new ones.

If I, as a female reader, am irritated by the lack, I can’t imagine how frustrating it must be for male readers, especially boys and young men who are developing their taste for reading!

Big publishers don’t want boy books – they’re wrong

But the Big 5 publishers don’t want to publish “boy books” anymore. Many will deny there’s even such a thing as a “boy” book, or that there shouldn’t be (“that’s not inclusive!!!”).

I strongly disagree with all 3 statements:

  • I want to see boy books published – I want to read them! And edit them. And market them to more readers who will love them.
  • There’s definitely such a thing as a book by, for, and about men/boys, that male readers enjoy more than female readers (not that girls can’t as well – I’m a woman and you just saw my favorites list). That doesn’t change the fact that at the core, they are bro books.
  • There should be boy books. Stories that feel like they were written just for you are incredibly powerful! Everyone should have the chance to read stories that delight and resonate with the deepest parts of our soul. If that means reading books about people that are like you… well, duh.

Modern publishing has a chicken and egg problem. They claim they don’t publish as many books about male main characters because male readers don’t buy books as much as female readers.

Male readers respond thusly: “We’ve stopped buying your books because you won’t publish the types we actually want to read.”

There are thriving indie publishers and reading communities online for action and adventure books that are just straight up fun – no identity politics, no need for sensitivity readers – just cool dudes running around with swords. Virtuous Sons, published initially as a web novel on Royal Road, received over 4 million views.

In the past, before the digital age and the advent of self-publishing, books published by the Big 5 were the only option. If you weren’t reading them, you weren’t reading. In their elitism, the Big 5 have refused to adjust their attitude. They blame their potential buyers rather than their own business model. But men are reading. They’re just taking their time and money elsewhere.

And why wouldn’t they, when their tastes are being insulted?

No, I have no interest in reading any of the “adventure fantasy” books on Amazon with grotesquely proportioned anime pinup girls spilling across the covers. No more than I want to read any of the romantasy featuring glowering, glistening, shirtless shifters.

But male readers (and female ones) are told they’re stupid or backward for wanting to read books about male heroes running around killing dragons, clearing dungeons, leveling up with ridiculously powerful magic, sitting around with their comrades swapping scar stories, and chasing (and getting) the girl at the end.

You’re not stupid. Those are great stories. Some are just good stories – that’s ok too.

What I’m NOT saying

Because everyone gets triggered so easily these days, let me tell you what I’m not saying.

I’m NOT saying that girl books are stupid, or that female authors shouldn’t write the stories they want to tell, or that female characters are worse than male characters, or that if a book can’t appeal to a male audience too, it shouldn’t be published, or that female characters can’t compel male readers etc. etc. etc.

I’m certainly not saying that for a book to be truly great, it needs to be by, for, or about men.

But the publishing industry needs to stop saying the opposite. Stop telling (white) male authors that it’s their duty to step aside and “stop taking up the limelight already so that others can have their turn.” Stop telling authors that their stories are “too male-centric” and that unless they have at least one female POV/main character, their book won’t even be considered. Stop telling male authors that strong, masculine, confident male protagonists are inherently problematic.

Write boy books!

I want to read your boy books! Even more so, I want to read your “men books” – with characters worthy of the tag “epic.” So please write them (whether you’re a male or female author)!

If you’re also on the hunt for modern bro books, you’re not alone. Guess what my most popular blog post is? By a massive margin.

It’s the one titled 18 High/Epic Young Adult Fantasy Books with a Male Protagonist. My third most popular post is 22 High/Epic Adult Fantasy Books with 1 POV & a Male Protagonist.

There is demand. Don’t let people tell you otherwise.

And if you’re a male author looking for a book editor, but are feeling a bit querulous after discovering that almost all book editors are women, you don’t have to worry that I’m going to treat you like a tasteless jerk for “having the audacity to think a story deserves to be told about a male main character who starts out as kind of a jerk.”

Characters are supposed to have weaknesses. There wouldn’t be a story if your characters didn’t have to grow and change.

Neither does a male protagonist have to be the most profound, unique character ever written in order to make a good story that readers will buy. The female protagonists in most modern books sure aren’t.

I would be delighted to read your story, review it, and perhaps even work with you to edit it into the best it can be.

So keep writing about brave boys and mighty men!

Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.

I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!

Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…

English Book Editor for International and ESL Authors

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Are you an author who speaks English as a second language? Welcome! Whether you’re dreaming of publishing your book with a North American publisher, or looking to translate your novel into English to reach a wider audience, our team would love to support you.

Let’s discuss a few key topics:

  1. Why publish your book in English?
  2. Common English as a second language errors
  3. Editing your novel
  4. How to get published in North America

Why publish your book in English?

First of all, I’d like to enforce the value of submitting your book to the English-speaking publishing market. According to data reports, books written in English make up between 1/3 to 1/2 of all global book sales.

In 2024, book sales in North America accounted for 33% of the global book market’s revenue. Europe accounted for a share of over 25% of worldwide book revenue.

Publishing your book in the English language will position your work in front of the largest demographic of book buyers in the world. A potentially lucrative choice!

Publishers and agents in these marketplaces are happy to accept the work of ESL authors from around the world, as long as your work holds up to industry standards. This means your work needs to be indistinguishable in quality from writing by native speakers.

Common English as a Second Language Errors

English is a hot mess! Native speakers admit it freely. The grammar is confusing, and it’s even harder to get the idioms right – for instance have you heard the phrase “hot mess” before? 😉

As an editor, I often see the same types of mistakes in writing by non-native English speakers:

  • Omission or incorrect use of articles such as a, an, the
  • Subject-verb agreement
  • Incorrect order of adjectives
  • Improperly used verb tenses
  • Overuse of passive voice and transitional phrases
  • Unclear sentence structure
  • Use of descriptors that don’t quite fit the context

A manuscript that contains basic errors like this will not appear marketable to an agent or publisher. Even if your English skills are exceptional, native speakers might still sense a stiffness to your style.

Working with a native English speaker will transform your novel, eliminating common errors and smoothing out cultural idiosyncrasies that you may not be aware of.

Editing Your Novel

I love working with global authors! You bring a unique perspective and style to storytelling which can be refreshing and exciting for native English-speakers to experience. As a reader, I am so incredibly blessed to have access to books from around the world that have been translated into my native language!

It’s been my privilege to work with authors from:

  • China
  • Central America
  • Ghana
  • Austria
  • Ethiopia

Types of projects I accept:

  • Manuscripts written in English by advanced or fluent ESL authors
  • Manuscripts that have been professionally translated into English and need a second look
  • Speculative fiction (sci-fi, fantasy, fairy tale and mythic retellings, etc.) is my specialty. I am also familiar with the mystery and thriller genres.

Projects I do not accept:

  • Manuscripts written by authors who are at the beginner or intermediate ESL level and still need significant language instruction
  • Manuscripts that have been translated with Google Translate, other AI, or a non-native English speaker
  • Nonfiction (excepting memoirs)

I would love to be able to work with all authors, but below a certain level of language proficiency, authors would benefit more from further language and writing instruction. A professional edit is a significant investment – it’s best to wait until your work is truly ready.

Self-Editing Support

I encourage you to take advantage of grammar and editing programs like ProWritingAid (both free and paid options available)! They highlight mistakes, but also explain each error, teach you the matching rule, and offer editorial suggestions. Unlike programs like Grammarly, ProWritingAid is designed for creative writing, not business or academic writing, and so they have better stylistic suggestions.

Running your work through programs like this can help you eliminate a lot of the more common mistakes, like absent articles, which will reduce the amount of time your editor needs to spend on later drafts – saving you money!

WARNING: Please be very careful not to write using AI! That is a sure way to get your work rejected by publishers. ProWritingAid offers suggestions for how to rewrite sentences. Do NOT just copy/paste them into your text. These programs are wonderful as a learning tool, but if you let them think for you, your writing skills will not improve.

How to Get Published in North America

Please note that while my team offers book publishing services to authors, including coaching, editing, self-publishing support, and marketing, Creative Cornerstones is not a publishing house or agency. We also do not offer translation services.

I would be delighted to edit your novel to maximize its quality and increase your likelihood of finding representation. I have worked with 2 publishing companies – Monster Ivy Publishing and Havok Publishing – and can advise you on the expectations of the publishing market in the United States.

Even native English speakers are increasingly hiring freelance editors before querying agents, because they know how competitive the industry is. In an attempt to cut costs, publishers are much more likely to accept a book that has already undergone developmental editing than one that needs significant rewrites.

Traditional publishing in the United States is dominated by the Big 5 Publishers:

  • Penguin Random House
  • HarperCollins
  • Macmillan Publishers
  • Hachette Book Group
  • Simon and Schuster

Each company operates many imprints – subsidiary publishing companies that they have acquired or created to specialize in certain sub-genres or audiences.

These companies are businesses looking to profit, so they seek books with mass appeal. They only offer deals for books they think will sell tens of thousands of copies – at least. If you’re seeking publication with a traditional publisher, you will first need to gain the representation of a literary agent.

For more information about finding a literary agent, I highly recommend Gina Kammer’s course on querying – she has over 15 years of experience in publishing and offers exceptional coaching to authors.

Other publishing options include mid-size and independent publishers, and self-publishing. I discuss these different routes in greater detail in the following article.

Ready to take your book to the next level?

I would love to hear more about your story and discuss how we could work together to make your book stand out in the crowd!

You are welcome to send me the first chapter of your book – I will complete a free sample edit on your first 1000 words and provide my recommendation for the type of edit your manuscript needs.

You can find a breakdown of the different types of editing – developmental, line, copy – here. Feel free to reach out to my team with any other questions as well!

Or check out this great resource: Compelling Conversations: Questions and Quotations on Timeless Topics – An engaging ESL textbook for Advanced ESL students

Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.

I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!

Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…

“Toxic Femininity” – Where “Strong Female Characters” Went Wrong

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By Caylah Coffeen

I recently picked up an epic fantasy book I had greatly anticipated reading – it promised unusual worldbuilding, an intricate plot, and a unique authorial voice. I didn’t make it through the first chapter.

In the opening, the main female character gets drunk, breaks into someone’s home to commit adultery, assaults the homeowner when he tries to stop her, and gets thrown in jail. When she wakes up, she bangs on the bars and yells at the guards to let her out, as though she’d done nothing wrong. A stranger, who greatly outranks her, bails her out and gets her acquitted because he wants to hire her. She struts out like she owns the place, doesn’t offer this man a single thank you, and instead mouths off at him, becoming offended that he expects her to work off her debt to him!

That’s when I stopped reading. I was astounded we were supposed to find this character likeable. Or even admire her defiant attitude and the gargantuan chip on her shoulder.

Unfortunately, this is the exact type of character readers can expect to see over and over again, advertised as a “strong female lead.”

I would use another word: cocksure. I’m sorry if you find that crass, but that’s the point – that’s exactly what these characters are.

The Double Standard

How is it that the word I’ve found to best describe these “strong female characters” has largely been used in the past to describe men being jerks? It’s pretty much the old word for “toxic masculinity!” If a male character acted the way these female characters do, that’s exactly what they’d be called! No, if they acted half so horribly, they would never have made it past a publisher’s slush pile. Instead, we would have seen acquisitions editors tweeting about how triggered they felt.

I’m glad that publishing has enacted a higher standard for male characters! So many male “heroes” in books do treat everyone around them terribly, break their word, kill and torture without remorse, look out only for themselves, emotionally abuse their friends, abandon their families, and drink, swear, and fight with impunity. It continues to horrify me that stories like Prince of Thorns were ever published, and I’m relieved that publishers would reject such books today.

But I don’t want to read about hubristic, “antihero” women any more than I want to read about sociopathic, egotistical men. So why is this behavior seen as not just acceptable, but “cool” when enacted by women?

It shouldn’t be, for two reasons. But before I get into why, let’s define our terms.

“Toxic” or “Sinful?”

I’m a Christian, and I’m fine with using the phrase “toxic masculinity” because men are sinners, and like all sinners, glorify their sin as right. The world’s version of a “strong man” is extremely different from God’s version, and yes, it’s often toxic. Greed, rape (jokes), idolatry, and violence are all sins that God condemns. In the Bible, the “men after his own heart,” are faithful, humble, selfless, obedient to his law, self-controlled, and gracious. This is “righteous masculinity,” nothing like the “locker room boasters” which our culture has seen as cool (in the past). And praise God for the men who seek to be made anew in such a way!

When women call out “toxic masculinity,” I feel a lot of compassion for people who are often coming from non-Christian households. They’ve never met a godly man in their life, and they don’t have the words to explain why their relationships feel so wrong. So they use terms given to them by mental health professionals.

However, I know that many modern* feminists also use the phrase “toxic masculinity” to assert that the idea of gender differences and the existence of masculinity are in themselves toxic. I reject that claim and do not use the phrase in such a way.

*Early feminists were wonderfully brave women who championed equal rights under the law and were almost all Christians, so please be careful if you’re tempted to make blanket denigrating statements about feminists. I encourage you to read about the different “waves” of feminism to understand how/when things went wrong.

Our culture also praises the sins of women, glorifying selfish, petty, greedy, cruel speech and actions as “subversive, bold, driven, audacious, or strong.” We could refer to this as “toxic femininity,” and indeed if we are going to call out sinful masculinity, then we should be willing to do the same for sinful versions of femininity.

Though perhaps it’d be much better if we dropped this phrase entirely, in favor of biblical language. The Bible uses different words than “toxic”:

Righteous or wicked
Godly or ungodly
Integrity or crookedness
Alive in Christ or dead in sin
The wise or the fools

What does Proverbs tell us about what it looks like to live a righteous life?

The righteous hate what is false, but the wicked make themselves a stench and bring shame on themselves.
The heart of the righteous weighs its answers, but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil.
The righteous detest the dishonest; the wicked detest the upright.

Proverbs 13:5, 15:28, 29:27

I yearn to read about main characters who are considered heroes because they are righteous, not because they are wicked!

How dare publishers act as though they’ve made a stand for morality, only to turn around and espouse those same evils when committed by people like themselves! And these new heroes aren’t even well written.

Most “Strong Female Characters” Are Badly Written

It wasn’t just a shift in culture that led to a decline in the “toxically masculine” character. Publishers just started pointing out that such characters are often badly written and make for flat stories. Which is true.

Contemporary female leads, like many stereotypical male leads in older books (prophesied farm boy), are often 2-dimensional, cut-and-pasted copies of each other. Handing a girl a sword doesn’t give her a personality, though apparently it gives the author an excuse not to develop one. The most noticeable things about them, aside from their superior talent and skills, are their entitlement, aggression, arrogance, and air of martyrdom. When the story starts, they are the universe’s gift to humanity, and when the story ends, they are the universe’s greater gift to humanity.

Readers see very little character development, with the exception of “healing” from whatever injustice the world has perpetrated against the main character. There are no personal flaws they need to face and overcome. Everything is someone else’s fault. This makes for extremely boring storytelling. It breaks the cardinal rule of character development.

Everyone who’s taken an intro to creative writing course knows the joke about “the frat boy who signed up to get an easy humanities credit”: The guy writes a story about a perfectly handsome, intelligent, desirable young man who breezes through all his problems and gets the girl who wrongly rejected him before. The professor has to explain that a good (and realistic) story needs flawed protagonists (not the same as morally grey) and problems that they can’t immediately overcome. This creates tension in the plot and spurs development in the character. Usually, the new writer resists, because their character is actually a self-insert and they feel personally attacked at the implication that they have flaws.

These points are no less true for female writers and female characters. In fact, these days male writers are much more likely to accept feedback when you tell them their character needs work – I know, I’ve worked with quite a few developing male writers. But female writers are likely to get up in arms if anyone criticizes how unrealistic or entitled their female characters are. Because these authors are often living out their dreams of being able to get away with literal crime, say whatever they want to the men in their life, and be respected and taken seriously for it.

And, predictably, the characters and plot of these stories suffer for it. Yet publishers will ignore these obvious problems when they’re seen in female characters, because they too are fantasizing about walking around like god and being worshiped for it – as all sinful humans do.

Which brings me to the second reason why we should reject “toxic femininity” – the glorification of unrighteous women – in books.

Bad Ideology, Bad Examples

The version of femininity which is portrayed in so many of these stories is not something I want to embody. I don’t find these women strong. They are not good role models. Most of them are angry, bitter, self-absorbed individuals who hate authority, are isolated from healthy community and family, and listen to no one but themselves. They are unrighteous and thoroughly broken.

These characters embody everything that women have called out as wrong in male behavior. At least modern feminists have gotten more honest. Their actual message is, “men shouldn’t play god, but women are god.” I suppose these books sell because fallen people do relate to this desire. I don’t know why anyone is shocked – this is the oldest sin there is.

“You will be like God, knowing good and evil.”

Yours truthlessly,
Satan

That’s the message publishers are selling to girls: “you can be like god.” Girls down these books like cheap shots, craving temporary gratification in place of the answer that will truly quench their thirst. Such stories can never satisfy, because they run in direct opposition to the Great Story, which tells of a plain, humble, kind man doing what is right and vanquishing evil at great cost to himself, for the sake of others.

This doesn’t mean I only want to read stories about knights saving damsels in distress from dragons, though the trope is justifiably iconic (pun intended)! This is one major reason why I personally prefer reading about male mc’s.

But I do want Queens who save their kingdom from evil. Yes, give me heroines running around in capes and busting out martial arts moves. I need to read stories about female strategists, inventors, explorers, and more. AND I want to read stories about mothers, sisters, shy girls, bookworms, wives, and any other profession out there.

SO LONG as all these women first and foremost embody integrity, kindness, faithfulness, humility, goodness, and other signs of godly character. So long as her flaws and mistakes are actually portrayed as problematic and she actively wrestles to overcome them!

We have beautiful examples to guide us!

Noah’s wife cared for her family through the ending of the world, Abigail defied her wicked husband, Ruth braved the wilderness and poverty for love, Esther faced the emperor of the known world head on, Mary encountered an eldritch creature with who knows how many eyeballs and sang for joy. Jael and the woman of Thebez smashed open the heads of villains with household implements!

The woman of Thebez wields her deadly millstone

These are strong women, brave women, faithful women – women after God’s own heart.

Don’t believe the world’s picture of femininity. It is toxic. It is the way that leads to death. I urge you not to write self-absorbed, 2D, arrogant female OR male characters, but to look at the truth of God’s word and write stories that would please him and better teach us how to hear his story.

P.S. If anyone wants to make a biblical argument in favor of the descriptor “toxic,” I’m all ears (Matt 16:6). After all, a little Axe body spray goes a long way. 😉

Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.

I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!

Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…

23 Author Moms Share Tips For How to Write a Book While Parenting

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Being an author is a super difficult journey, and so is being a mom! So how can we do both (and well)? I’m not a mother myself (yet!), but I just spent a precious 2 weeks with my newborn nephew, and have been pondering what my future will look like.

So I reached out to over 20 writer moms to hear how they parent and write at the same time! They offered some specific wisdom, compassion, and anecdotes which I wanted to share with you too. Be sure to check out their books or social pages to support author moms!

Dedicated to my dear friend Stephy (who is an adorable mom!): I know you’ll publish your stories one day! I’m rooting for you!

  1. Be gracious to yourself
  2. Dedicate yourself fully to each season in your life
  3. Write while the kids are in bed
  4. Stick to a schedule
  5. Multitask (“drive-by writing”)
  6. Surround yourself with supportive people
  7. Try dictation
  8. Have a backup plan
  9. Include your kids
  10. Take a break from the kids
  11. Take care of yourself
  12. Your stories still matter!

Be Gracious to Yourself (God Sure is)!

“Just rethink what counts as writing, honestly. Absorbing fiction books to store away ideas for later is writing. Reading craft books is writing. Having a newborn is exhausting and time consuming, and a huge learning curve. Be kind to yourself, and remember this is only a season, it will be over way too soon. Also remember that your fellow writers understand. Nobody is expecting a new mom to publish anything right away.”

H. Halverstadt

“This is a verse that came to me back in fall 2023, while I was writing one of my novels. Rev 21:5: “He who was seated on the throne said, ‘I am making everything new!’ Then he said, ‘Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.'” God renews us. He makes everything new. That meant even on my weariest and most stressful of days, he could still do things with me and my writing. So that’s a verse that has given me incredible hope.”

Christina Kuhn

Dedicate Yourself Fully to Each Season in Your Life

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to be silent and a time to speak.”

Ecclesiastes 3

“I wrapped my identity a little around being a writer as a young woman, but marrying a Marine, having a kid, moving around out of my “safety net” of being close to family so I often had to do things alone… I took a very long break. But when it was time to get started again, when the season was right, and I was just like, “Okay, now,” it rose to meet me. Sometimes we’re not in the season we want or we want it all at once. It’s good to embrace the pauses as well as the progress.”

H.L. Burke

“Invest in your family and marriage. Writing will always be there, but your kids will not. You don’t want to miss out on your little ones growing up, or even worse, your kids believing that writing took you away from them. Find balance. Write during naps, early mornings, or after bed. Limit your words to 500 a day so you can be present with your family. Put off publishing until they are older (I did this).

And don’t forget your spouse. If you want a thriving marriage, don’t put your spouse on the back burner. The worst thing is to achieve all you desired as a writer, only to look around and realize you’re alone. Yes, some sacrifices must be made to become a writer. Don’t let your family be one of them.”

Morgan L. Busse

“I keep telling myself this is a season, and someday I will have more time to write again. Right now, my babies need me more than I need to write, so for now, I am content with that. But I keep writing down ideas and brainstorming and daydreaming and hope that in those moments of writing, no matter how few and far between or close together, that all the mental plotting will pay off as I get words on the page.”

Julie Harbinson

“I have three kids aged 3 and under and I’m still figuring this out. It’s helped me to become okay with being in a season where I don’t write much if at all sometimes. Right now, I write for joy when I can. Lately it’s worked really well to get up early, have my coffee and read the Bible, and then write until the kids wake up.”

Rosemary Johnson

Write When the Kids are in Bed!

“For me, I usually post social media posts before my girls wake up in the morning (I usually don’t get up that much earlier, but it helps me feel productive as a writer first thing). I have a 5.5 and a 2 year old, so my oldest does go to school for half days. When she is at school and my youngest naps, I use that time to write or edit (if im lucky that’s 2 hours every afternoon). Then my girls go to bed at 7pm, so I usually try my best to write or read every evening (usually another 2ish hours).

On the weekends, my husband and I take turns being productive/watching the girls so the other can have a longer period to be productive. I usually try not to work on writing or author stuff while my girls are awake. That’s a personal decision tho haha and it changes and depends on the age of your babies. I get a ton of writing done with a newborn, but I know that’s not the same for others haha.”

Taylor Pence

Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might, for in the realm of the dead, where you are going, there is neither working nor planning nor knowledge nor wisdom.

Ecc 9:10

“I’m going to come back and edit this comment once I’m done cooking dinner, lol!
EDIT: I am finally back (made/cleaned up dinner, chasing kids, getting ice cream with my bro who is in town for work, and feeding a baby…phew!).

I have two kiddos, one is 2.5, the other is almost 4 months. It’s hard to get anything done. My toddler likes to follow me everywhere, and while my baby is amazing, she is still a baby. I don’t know that I have any of this figured out yet, but right now, I typically write at night once they’re in bed, so my writing time can range from 10 min – 2 hours depending on how tired I am. It’s very slow going right now, but I’m trying to get back into typing on my phone while putting the baby to sleep.”

Julie Harbison

“Do you see someone skilled in their work? They will serve before kings; they will not serve before officials of low rank.”

Proverbs 22:29

Stick to a Schedule!

“I’m a homeschooling mom of three kids, ages 12, 8, and 3. I’ll be fully honest. It was pretty overwhelming to be pregnant or dealing with a younger baby and write at the same time, so I took a lot of breaks during those seasons. Otherwise, my older kids would buddy up to play outside, and I wrote while my youngest napped. I keep my kids on a routine/schedule so that they sleep roughly about the same time every night. This allows me to do at least 1-1.5 hours of writing/editing every morning before anyone else is up.

I used to live near my parents, who could provide childcare, and that allowed me to get even more writing done. But now that I’ve moved across the country, my writing time is pretty scarce. All the more critical that I stay on my schedule.”

Christina Kuhn

“For me, early mornings are non-negotiable if I want to get anything done. I go to bed early and get up around 4:30 or so. I struggle with brief sprints, so I really treasure having a solid 1.5 hours or so to sit and focus on writing. I can get a decent amount done, and it makes me feel so “free” throughout the rest of my crazy mom/homeschooling day.

Proverbs 31 is a great chapter to look at for moms who are also writers! We can be industrious while still taking care of our homes and families. It can be tough to balance, but I’m thankful Scripture makes it clear that it’s possible to do both well.”

Kendra Warden

“She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.”

Proverbs 31:25

Multitask or “Drive-By Writing”

“Our dining room was in the exact center of the house. I put my laptop on the table and made a rule for myself that I had to write 1 sentence every time I passed it. That got me to my 1000 words a day goal and I never stopped to work for more than a minute or two.”

E. A. Comiskey

“I first started writing seriously again when I had a nine month old and a 4 year old. Now they’re 17 and 14 and … usually are ignoring me. I basically just wrote whenever I could. As they got a little older, were sleeping through the night, and had a said bedtime, I’d usually put them to bed at 8 and then write for an hour every night. I also wrote waiting for their gymnastics class to end, in doctor’s waiting rooms, on park benches… You just have to grab the time you’re given and go for it.”

Heidi Lyn Burke

“lol I do drive-by writing. I usually have google docs open on my phone and will work on a scene through the day. Most of my writing time is with kids on me or near me. I usually keep my goals low at around 500-1000 words a day. It all adds up.”

Cara Ruegg

“I do drive-by writing! My kids are older (8+), but my laptop and charger live on the counter. If I can squeeze in 15 minutes a few times a day while they’re awake, I call it a success. After food and conversation works best! That goes for all ages.”

Stacey Yaroszeufski

“I did a lot of world building and brainstorming while doing dishes. Especially when listening to inspiring music. 🥰 And while nursing I’d read, critique, chat with other writers, or check social media on my phone. And once the kids were in bed I’d sit with my laptop and type, next to my husband while he played video games or watched a show.”

Elle Wither

“Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

Phil 4:8

“I always keep notes on my phone whenever the muse strikes so that when I do get to my writing time, I’ve got a list of ideas ready to go. I find I get more done in short focused bursts than when I have a whole day to write. I’m more creative when I’m forced to do it quickly. Driving time is also great to think through scenes or identify plot holes.”

A.E. Dinsmoor

Surround Yourself with Supportive People

“I have a 14, 11, and 9 year old at home, and most of my writing these days is done on my weekly writing nights with RJ Conte—basically we do word sprints for an hour or two and check in with each other to share word counts and snippets of what we’ve written. At the end of the evening we call and read each other what we wrote (if we feel ready to share it). It’s the best!! Doing it once a week is very low pressure but I still get some consistent (slow) progress on projects, and sometimes it gets my momentum going so that I want to keep working on it for days afterward!

I’m by no means a full-time writer. I consider myself more of an artist-hobbyist. But I’m glad to keep creating anyway—I couldn’t create as much as I do without supportive friends! 🥰 So my advice is to pick a consistent day/time and have an accountability partner or two to team up with. It’s satisfying to at least have some progress each week even in the middle of busy parenting and work!”

Bethany A. Jennings

“My husband is very supportive of me and helps so much! Find a couple good friends to cheer you on and champion you. It makes a world of difference.”

A.E. Dinsmoor

“I rely on my husband or outside help like occasionally my mom or one of my brothers to take the kids so I can get more time. I’m lucky that my husband works from home 7-3 and gets the full government parental leave offered here in Canada. Things are a bit hectic right now with a newborn and three other little kids but I fully anticipate lots of writing time later on over the course of his leave.”

Selina de Luca

Try Dictation (Voice to Text)

“Out of desperation I tried something totally different. Voice to text has been a big help. Then I take 10 to 15 minutes at night to organize it into sections, but I’m still in the planning stage. I have the story outlined, specific dialogue for important scenes, extensive world building, and character sketches. I should be ready to start compiling and do the actual writing next week.
It’s far different than the ways I’ve written before, but I’m in a much better place than I’ve ever been. I’m feeling confident that I can actually finish a WIP for the first time. This is working for me, but you do what works for you.”

Naomi Talitha

“I know a lot of moms who use dictation and get a lot of writing done while they’re doing chores around the house! I’ve done that a little bit, I’m dictating this comment right now while pumping breast milk, haha. It will take practice for me to use it more for my actual drafting! But I know others who have had success doing that. I have definitely done it here and there though, a few times dictating for example while making supper in the kitchen or something. Multitasking!”

Selina de Luca

Have a Backup Plan

“Try to have a backup plan to help get around especially chaotic days. For example, I identify my writing time for the day, as well as two potential backup options. This way, if my plans go sideways, I know I have another opportunity waiting for me (even if that’s after they’ve gone to bed). Then I just aim to write for at least 10 minutes, which usually goes a bit longer.”

Erin P.T. Canning

Include Your Kids in the Journey

“I’m a mom of three under 7 and all have varying special/medical needs as well. It is very overwhelming, but also an enormous joy. I try to incorporate the kids in whatever I am doing, from acting out scenes, to listening to a passage, to working on artwork. They are so excited and proud to “help mommy write.” I actually just gave each of them a copy of my latest and signed a message to them thanking them for being my helpers.

They have taken that honor so seriously. And coffee. Coffee is amazing. 😅“

A.E. Dinsmoor

“I homeschool my 10 yr old son and (since he’s full of stories too) we have a section of his school day that is writing a story. I squeeze some words into a notebook then along with him. We also attend a local writer’s group together. “

Jaymi Mozeak

“Oh, that my words were written! Oh, that they were inscribed in a book! That they were engraved on a rock with an iron pen and lead, forever! For I know that my Redeemer lives, And He shall stand at last on the earth.”

Job 19:23-25

“It’s been really great writing with kids. They are my inspiration. I warned them anything snarky they say can be used in a book. My teen daughter writes too now. She’s working on her third novel.
The theme of my book is Psalm 42:11–“Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope thou in God…” And it’s an especially important truth to remember when raising children.

There’ll be times when you’re overwhelmed and need wisdom. So even though the book is fantasy, there are elements of truths I’ve learned along the way in my own life.”

Leanna Rapier

Take a Break From the Kids

“For the first time ever, I am spending the night in a hotel room to get some writing done. I checked in at 3 PM, wrote for about three hours. Drove to band practice because it’s not far from the hotel I’m staying at, and then when I got back, I wrote for another three hours. The time went by so fast it’s already after midnight. I wrote over 6,000 words in two sittings. I have no one to worry about but myself.
I really needed this break because my kids have special needs (they have autism and genetic deletions). I think maybe I need to do this every year for NaNoWriMo. I am astonished at how much I wrote and how the lack of distractions worked on me. Now I must admit, most of the writing is painfully bad but at least I’m writing!”

Alexandra Owen

“My daughter is nearly four. What I have learnt to do is if we do something fun (like lunch out), the deal when we get back is we both get “calm time.” This means she can watch cartoons or play in her room for an hour. I’ve phrased it as part of the deal of getting a treat out.
I’ve found if I say I’m doing work, she’ll want my attention for everything. If we are both having calm time, then she seems quite happy to amuse herself.”

Rachael Marie

“I focus on teaching independence to my kids to give myself extra breaks.”

Christina Kuhn

Take Care of Yourself

“Personal nutrition is key for having the brain/energy capacity to write. I absolutely have to make sure I eat enough protein if I’m going to have the brain power to write and be creative, which surprisingly at this stage, I often do. I have to take care of my body to take care of my mind…”

Ellyn Franklin

Your Stories Still Matter (Hugely)!

“One bible verse I like to reflect on is Matthew 13:34: ‘All these things Jesus spoke in parables to the multitudes: and without parables he did not speak to them.’ Jesus was the ultimate storyteller and this verse proves the value of storytelling!”

Cara Ruegg

“My kids are 2 and almost 4 and writing makes me feel sane, and healthy, and more myself which makes me a better wife and mother and more balanced person. I love that!”

E.A. Winters

“Truly loving what I do keeps me going. It is a calling for me that I really see the Lord blessing, so writing brings me joy — even when I’m dead tired. My goal is that when someone is reading or hearing something I write, ‘many will see it and fear, and will call upon the name of the LORD.’ This is the desire and motivation that keeps me going, even through the little years of parenting. Whether I’m penning fiction, gospel encouragement, or anything else, I want it to be for His praise, and so that others see Him reflected in whatever I write.”

A.E. Dinsmoor

What are your writing/momming tips?

Comment below with your own advice to support fellow writer moms! Or message our team if you’d like your suggestions and book to be featured!

Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.

I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!

Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about writing and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…

Character Development Questions – Beginner, Intermediate, and Advanced

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A character has popped into your head, and now you want to write them! How do you develop this character to feel realistic and make readers care about them? Imagine yourself sitting down in a tavern to get to know your character. What kind of questions would you ask them?

To help you get started, I’ve listed beginner questions that go over the basics like appearance, skills, and backstory. Then, some intermediate questions that further examine who your character is and why they behave as they do. Finally, if you’ve been writing for a long time, feel stuck, or are looking for some questions you might not find on other character development sheets, we have some advanced questions that dig further into the psychology of your character.

Use this as a brainstorming resource, but don’t force yourself to answer everything! I encourage you to write down your answers as mini scenes – just listing traits gets boring pretty fast. You can download an editable Word document with all the questions here. Or I like to start a Pinterest/mood board to “collect” my character’s outfits, weapons, and castles! The first rule is have fun!

  1. Stage 1 – Beginner character development questions
  2. Stage 2 – Intermediate character development questions
  3. Stage 3 – Advanced character development questions

Stage 1 – Beginner Character Development Questions

These are the bare bones that you need to know as a writer in order to craft a compelling story.

Defining Features

What is their name and what does it mean? (Are their parents actually the type of people who’d give them a profound/unique name?) How do they feel about their name?

What are their physical features? What do they like and dislike about their own body?

How do they dress and groom (makeup, tattoos) and is this important to them?

What are some of your character’s favorite things (foods, clothes, activities, romantic types)?

What are some of their dislikes (phobias, allergies, irritating childhood acquaintances, pet peeves)? What are their dealbreakers?

Status Quo

What does their everyday life look like (job, school, social life)?

What is their socioeconomic status and how does this affect them? How large of a role does money play in their mindset?

What do they like about their current life?

What do they wish they could change?

“Stats”

What’s something your character is good at? Do they like this about themself?

What’s something they’re bad at? Do they dislike this about themself?

What’s their highest level of education or training (in a skill or craft)? How quickly do they learn new things?

Social Circle

Who are their closest friends and family and how healthy are these relationships?

Who are your character’s enemies (or rivals, or people they dislike)? Why?

What are some defining features (traditions, mannerisms, habits) of their culture of origin?

Do they like or dislike their culture (hate big family gatherings, like greeting people with a kiss, chafe under strict hierarchies etc.)?

How do other characters perceive your mc on average (e.x. the town clown, the teacher’s pet, the eccentric recluse)?

Inner Life

What is your character’s driving goal, desire, or need?

What makes your character laugh?

What makes them cry?

What makes them angry?

How do they demonstrate intense emotions (lash out, suppress it, talk it out)?

Stage 2 – Intermediate Character Development Questions

Here, we start to get into greater detail, fleshing out what you already know. The reader doesn’t need to know all of these facts, but they will affect how you write the character. In fact, many of these details will enhance a story most if they are not explicitly stated, but shown over time as a pattern of behavior. Don’t tell the reader your mc will start a fight with someone who makes them feel stupid, but remains calm when hangry – show us and let us draw our own conclusions.

Environment

What is their dwelling place like and what makes them feel most at home (luxurious, homey, full of people, quiet, near nature, etc.)?

How important are possessions and ownership to them (are material items important, do they keep heirlooms and collections, are they a minimalist)?

How in tune are they with their surroundings? Do they notice shifting details?

Personality (Behavioral Patterns)

What is their personality type (use any common personality test or get started with the questions below)?
How comfortable are they around strangers and do social interactions drain or enliven them?
Do they make decisions based primarily on emotion or logical reasoning?
Are they rule abiding or free spirits?
Do they perform better in structured settings or with flexibility?
Are they better at street smarts or book smarts?
Are they a motivated worker and curious learner?

^TIP: Be aware of how your own personality affects how you write characters. I’ve read characters who were supposed to be outgoing, but spent most of their time (even in group situations) internally thinking about what was going on around them – that’s an introverted behavior which the author likely defaulted to out of familiarity.

What’s your character’s love language?

How do they behave when pushed to the brink (exhausted, grieving, in pain, hungry, trapped)? Do they have differing responses to varying threats?
– E.x. some people respond well to an intellectual challenge, but cave under physical pressure, and vice versa.

Relationships

How do they form relationships with others?
– Do they have a lot of friends, or a few deep ones?
– Do they take a while to open up to people, or strike up a conversation with everyone they meet?

What are the requirements for joining their inner circle?

How much weight do they put on how other people view them? How much are they motivated by external social pressure?

Are they aware of their reputation? Is their self-image in line with their external one?

Past

What’s a part of their upbringing that they have rejected?

What’s something your character is truly proud of?

What’s something your character deeply regrets?

What’s the worst thing that’s ever happened to them?

What’s something/someone they miss?

Quirks

What’s a unique physical quirk of theirs (birthmark, can or cannot roll their tongue, weirdly flexible in a certain part of their body, fingernails grow super fast)?

What are their physical advantages (5 senses, looks, stamina, great at power-naps)?

What are their physical disadvantages (weak knees, prone to headaches, jittery, natural sprinters – just terrible at long-distance running)?

What are their mental advantages and disadvantages (mental health disorders, intelligence, memory, focus, creativity, problem-solving capacity, executive function ability)?

Habits

Night owl or early bird?

Heavy or light eater?

Do they partake in intoxicating substances? What kind of a drunk are they (flirty, weepy, loud)?

What are their opinions and preferences about sex?

What’s a habit or mistake your character just can’t seem to shake (being late, forgetting things, picking toxic partners)?

Beliefs

What are their deepest beliefs and convictions?
– This could refer to religion, ideology, and political alignment, but also to internal codes like “family first,” or “no good deed goes unpunished,” or “every man paves their own way.”

What is their mindset toward death? How was this shaped (personal experience, upbringing)?

What’s something they could not live without? Do they know this about themself?
– Many people think they can’t live without their career or a certain part of their identity, only to discover what “truly matters” the hard way.

Has your character ever committed a crime? What is their attitude toward the law?

Stage 3 – Advanced Character Development Questions

Many stories do not take their characters further than stage two. People are more than a list of personality traits, features, and needs, and are certainly more than what we can see in a plot. We learn, but then regress, change, and then change again. People are complex and demonstrate inconsistencies in both thought and behavior. This round of questions seeks to go past “what” and “who” your character is and ask “why?” Digging deeper into your character’s psyche can push your story to become more meaningful, enhancing themes and character arcs.

But sometimes a story is richer for the things the author knows, which take place off the page, but which aren’t necessarily resolved in the book. These are the type of things you might wish to keep as secrets from your readers. Or never fully show – there’s nothing quite so tantalizing as a half-revealed backstory. A great story will spark additional levels of imagination in your readers, because they can sense that your imagination went to greater depths. They’ll chase after you if you give them the seeds for thought.

What is the nature of their character (ethos), and more importantly why?
– In the past, people might have asked if a man or woman was of “good character,” referring to the level of integrity, honor, or virtue a person displayed. Today, we might instead ask after a person’s “true colors,” in an attempt to see if someone acts morally or immorally.
– Is your character honest or do they lie easily? Do they keep their word or are they flaky? Do they treat others respectfully or degradingly? Do they have a strong work ethic or are they lazy? Are they magnanimous or self-centered? Are they fair and consistent in their dealings with others?

What are some internal inconsistencies in your character’s behaviors, thought-processes, or belief systems?

What does your character get wrong about themself?
– People think they understand themselves, and often they don’t. Some people will switch jobs, partners, or homes, only to realize they preferred their old one, but didn’t understand why.

Is your character deliberate about their relational boundaries? How did they learn them? If they have not, are they a pushover, emotionally codependent, callously indifferent to others?

Do your character’s hobbies actually affect how they think and interact with the world on a daily basis?
– For instance, if your character is a musician, they’ll likely hum a lot, notice sounds and voices more than others, and make metaphors based around music. An artist will see color and shape in unique ways and go out of their way to see pretty things. An engineer or handyman might collect odds and ends and tinker with things as they sit and talk with friends. It’s not enough to state that your character likes something – it has to actually visibly impact their life and behavior.

How in tune is your character with other peoples’ inner lives?
– Are they a good judge of character, sensitive to emotions, and know the right thing to say at the right time, or do they miss the mark, guess at peoples’ motivations, or act on instinct rather than insight?

How well does your character understand themself?
– Are they aware of their own capacity for self-insight, or deluded by their vision of themself?
– Do they want to understand themself better and actively reflect upon themself?

How do they reconcile with others?
– For instance, do they need time to cool off after an argument, or do they want to clear the air right away? Do they want a detailed breakdown showing the other person understood why they were angry, or do they want the other person to make a gesture to make up for it?
– How do they make amends when they were in the wrong?

What’s their style of conversation?
– Authors can fall into the trap of making all their characters converse in a similar style (to them). But different people converse in a variety of ways. Do they love or hate small talk? Love deep discussions or not want to touch anything personal with a 10 foot pole. People have conversational quirks like: telling the same story over and over again even though people are sick of hearing it, info dumping a lot at once about a topic they find interesting, saying very little for a while and then stunning everyone with something powerful and profound, asking a lot of questions in response to what others say, asking no questions about others but instead replying with a similar anecdote of something that happened to them.
– Some people are good listeners, while others won’t shut up about themselves. Some people pause a lot between words, while others talk a mile a minute. Lean into these unique idiosyncrasies! The way people talk (or don’t) to each other can be a huge barrier in relationships and an interesting point of conflict in a story.

How do their unique traits bring out different qualities in their companions?
– People respond to others in different ways. Not everyone will love, hate, or laugh around your character. Sometimes a main character comes across as boring not (just) because they’re a reader insert, but because everyone in the story responds to them in the exact same way. In a single group, your main character might bring out courage in one individual, belligerence in another, and attraction in a third.
– The best stories are ones that don’t have only strongly developed characters, but also strongly developed character dynamics. Do these individuals bring out the best or worst in each other? Stories are formed when people clash and bond in unique ways that evolve over time.

Download the Word Doc to Start Writing!

Character Development Questions – Beginner, Intermediate, AdvancedDownload

Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.

I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!

Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…

YA Books Suffer a Plague of Cut-and-Paste Personalities and Reader-Insert Characters

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By Caylah Coffeen

Fantasy and science fiction have become more unique and diverse in the past 5 years alone. As a reader, I’m delighted to see a sudden surge of genre blending, plus stories set in non-western places, by authors from all over the world! I keep picking up these books, only to put them down in frustration when the main character doesn’t live up to the concept.

In the past couple years I’ve started and dropped Throne of Glass, The City of Brass, Spin the Dawn, Jade City, The Tiger at Midnight, Empire of Sand, and more despite absolutely loving the worldbuilding and premise of all of them.

I could not resonate with any of the main characters. After trying all of these in quick succession, it occurred to me that I could swap any of the female leads, and I wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. They faced problems the same way, talked smack the same way, and reacted to people and changes with a seemingly identical script.

To those who might protest that I’ve just outgrown these characters (that was my first thought too – it’s been a while since I was 17), I’d remind you that the largest demographic for YA readers is not actually teenagers, but women in their 30s-40s!

As another disclaimer, the most common reason I will drop a book is if the characters don’t catch me. I’ve done this plenty of times with adult books. But I’ve noticed a distinct pattern to why young adult characters in particular can fall flat.

Mashing together all personality traits to maximize “reader-insert” potential

These days, large publishing houses only buy books they can mass market. This means they look for stories and characters with the greatest appeal for the greatest number of people. Unfortunately, this results in characters who seem to embody all major personality traits melded together. After all, you want any reader to be able to insert themself.

Some people love personality tests, others hate them, and most agree that there is little scientific basis to any of them. Regardless of your stance, I’m going to reference the Myers Briggs test to illustrate this point.

The Myers Briggs test breaks personalities into 4 categories where people fall along a scale between two major traits. You’re probably familiar with the scale of introversion/extroversion. Most people fall closer to one than the other. Some people fall right in the middle and call themselves ambiverts, and that’s possible for the other categories in the personality test too. This is where we see great variety in people – after all, even if you share the same “type,” no two people are the same.

But I’ve never once met someone who would say that they fall in the middle for every single trait in this (or another personality) test. But that’s just what most YA characters seem to be – an average of everything.

Let’s break down each personality category for some concrete examples. (I won’t explain the test in much detail below, as that’s not the point of this article, but you can find more information about it here.)

Introversion/Extroversion –

Most YA characters I’ve encountered lately are a bit reserved, with one or two close friends, yet they also have little problem meeting new people, engaging in large groups, or persuading strangers and influential people to their opinion. These characters have a small inner circle, or very little in the way of a social support structure, but this often seems more like a choice, as if the rest of the world is just not as cool as them. But if they only put their mind to it, of course they could be the most popular girl in the room (Katniss).

One of the major problems with this is that the character gets to experience the best of both worlds, without the downsides of either. They don’t get nervous and make awkward mistakes in big groups, and they don’t talk way too much and put people off. This makes for boring character development – a rounded character needs weaknesses. But when you average out extremes of a personality, you avoid a lot of (interesting) problems that could make their story more unique.

Book Smarts/Street Smarts (Intuitive/Sensing) –

Can you pick up knife throwing in a week and best everyone else in your party? But can you also analyze a new political landscape and design a strategy that people 30 years your senior somehow never thought of? Well, most YA characters can do both!

They’re athletic, hands on, and pick up new skills quickly, making their odds of survival great. But they’re also of above-average intelligence and are great at coming up with clever plans on the fly, even in situations they’ve never encountered before.

It’d be more interesting if these characters had one set of skills in which they excelled, and struggled with other areas. Someone who spends their whole life physically training will probably have trouble focusing on a book about the local religion and vice versa.

But while characters often make jokes like, “oh, I’m terrible at math,” or “if our wagon wheel breaks, we’ll be stranded for 3 weeks,” these supposed weaknesses never actually affect the character and plot. They still cobble together practical fixes and have no trouble budgeting their finances while on a mad dash across the kingdom.

Feeling/Thinking (what you Primarily base your decisions on) –

Teenagers are hormonal and emotional, and so many YA characters understandably make their decisions based on their feelings in the moment. Yet, likely because authors don’t want their female characters accused of being “controlled by their emotions,” they feel the need to portray their characters as perfectly aware of all logical routes and just willfully choosing otherwise.

For instance, in a book I recently started, we’re introduced to the FL as she spins a magic spell in a public square. She hates this spell and wants to deviate from her mentor’s instructions. She feels very strongly about this, but looks into her mentor’s eyes, sees the warning, remembers her teacher could abandon and leave her in poverty, or that the king could have her executed for the deviation.

She thinks through all these reasons even as she’s apparently swept up by her own emotions. Then decides, “I’m going to do it anyway.” The spell shatters and she is punished – an entirely avoidable scenario.

More and more, I see scenes like this, where the character creates problems for themselves with stupid decisions. That’s definitely something humans do ALL THE TIME. But these choices are often strangely depicted, not as stupid, but as daring or assertive.

And again, these authors are trying to have the best of both worlds – “oh, yes my character feels very deeply and just gets carried away sometimes – don’t we all? Oh, but she didn’t really get carried away – you see, she thought through every possible problematic outcome first, and just decided to face them all! It’s not like she’s foolish or incapable of controlling herself.” Um… ok?

Go-with-the-flow/Structured (Perceiving/Judging) –

Again, many teenagers are impulsive as a result of their rapidly shifting hormones, so it’s not too much of a stretch that many YA characters would be perfectly happy to abandon their home on short notice for a new quest. But people still tend to prefer one or the other in their life and day-to-day schedules – flexibility or consistency.

Yet so many of these impulsive characters also fit perfectly fine into more structured scenarios. I need to go undercover at a royal court, which has a rigid set of rules? No problem! I’m not bouncing on the balls of my feet all day – I can keep my cool perfectly in any situation.

Some characters are the opposite – they’ve grown up with the same schedule every day (a farm, the military, a magic school), but when their whole world is upturned, they do just fine.

Sure, they may miss their old life, but they don’t feel lost, agitated, lose sleep or perform more poorly than usual because of this sudden shift which does not suit their needs. Or if they do, they very quickly overcome it, as though it was just a habit, and not one of their core traits as a person.

YA personalities embody everything and nothing

Whether you agree with this way of analyzing a personality or not, the point is, YA characters these days are designed to embody everything and nothing at the same time, so that they will resonate with the most readers.

This is not only unrealistic, but makes these characters exceptionally boring. Where are the unique quirks and flaws that make you laugh and want to talk about a character for years to come?

I have a couple friends who love YA, and it’s struck me that no matter how many YA books they recommend to me, they never say, “oh, I just loved this character because x.” They rarely mention the characters at all. Because most of these books are situational – they’re about what happens, not who is facing these trials.

But do readers actually want characters like this? Sarah J. Mass books are wildly popular after all – so clearly plenty of readers love these stories, but do they really love these characters?

Or do they get swept up in the quick pace and frenetic emotions that define the YA genre, and not realize that if the plot paused, they might not really care about the characters themselves?

Writing Tips: how to avoid this pitfall

Personality tests can be a fun way to analyze your character and make sure you write them with consistent reactions across your stories. It can also help you flag if you’re writing too many characters of the same type. That’s only natural as writers – we write what we’re familiar with and drawn to. But opposites attract and create all sorts of other sparks that make for great stories.

If you’re writing a female young adult character, you may be afraid to give her flaws, especially ones that women have often been accused of, and with good reason. Women are far too often portrayed negatively in fiction. But it’s just as bad when they’re underdeveloped, 2-dimensional, or cut-and-pasted.

If you play it too safe, making your character a little too perfect, too talented, or too generic, you’ll unintentionally be adding to the crowd of flat female characters. Be bold! Give your female characters personalities with more extreme quirks. Some readers may be turned off. Who cares? There should be a space in fiction for all sorts of main characters, not just the brash, aloof Homecoming Queens.

Writers hate on ourselves and compare ourselves way too much to others, so I say this with caution, but it’s worth asking if your character feels too similar to a slew of other heroes. I’m also a marketing professional, and it’s necessary to analyze the market.

If you see a lot of similar characters out there, it can mean they’re in high demand – readers do seek out the same archetypal characters again and again (the antihero, the guy next door, the angsty assassin). But it’s also a sign that your character may not feel original to your readers. Trends do come and go, and if a press has already published a lot of Sarah J. Mass lookalikes, they, and their readers, may be looking for something fresh.

Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.

I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!

Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…

The Problem with Multiple Point of View Characters – Part 1: Harder to Hook Readers

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By Caylah Coffeen

You have to do much more work to get a reader invested

With every major point of view character, authors must check off all the same boxes: establish the status quo, show the individual’s wants and needs, give readers a reason to root for them, and spark off their story with an inciting incident.

With only one POV character, authors can achieve many of these benchmarks within the first few chapters. This period of time is vital to securing reader interest. If you can’t catch them within this time, most readers will not continue.

But with each new POV, authors wipe all their own efforts away by resetting the reader’s emotional slate clean and starting all over again. I may be interested at the end of an opening chapter, but suddenly I’m faced with another stranger that vies for my investment.

Then a third. God forbid 4 or more. It could take an hour to get back to the first character, at which point all the emotional tension has faded and I have to restart in my efforts to connect with them.

Publishers may think multiple POVs offer more likelihood to get readers invested. After all, odds are a reader will like at least one of them. But I think of it the other way around.

Imagine talking to a talented salesperson. They really rope you in, know their stuff, and get you excited. You’re almost convinced about the purchase. But then they add on another product, again nearly persuading you. But then they start talking about a third one! And you have to make a decision on all three purchases at once? That’s overwhelming.

you have to “sell” Readers on all your characters at once

Consider also how your friends and family respond when you talk about your story. Do you know the glazed look they get in their eyes or the uncertain tone in their voice when you start packing on too much information?

You’ve probably learned to share about just one element or character at a time. But a new reader is like these friends – hesitant to try your story and only willing to invest so much time into making up their mind.

The more POV characters you employ, the higher the chance a reader will get worn out before you even reach your inciting incident. After all, you’re yanking their emotions around between many different people and locations, and it will take much longer to reach the “exciting” events which really kick off the story.

Alternatively, one character may have a riveting introduction, while another has a lackluster one. A reader may decide that it’d be too frustrating to go back and forth between one character they love, and one they find uninteresting, and put the book down. I’ve done this before.

Writing Tips for Multiple POV’s

Considering how many published books feature multiple POVs in the market these days, you may not think this will pose much of a problem. After all, clearly many readers are willing to give these books a try, and some even seek them out specifically. Preferences vary, but it is still important to keep in mind that the opening of your book is the most vital time in which to hook a reader.

Read, read, read! Have you read Brandon Sanderson, Robert Jordan, George R.R. Martin, and Ken Liu? They are some of the most popular writers who employ multiple POVs. Was it hard for you to get into these books? When did you lose interest, and what hooked you again? These are the types of elements to emulate or avoid in your own work.

Some authors choose to write multiple chapters back to back from one POV before switching to another. This gives readers more time to become attached to them. Others write shorter chapters but switch POV more often.

Also, remember to rely on your beta readers. It’s hard, but necessary to ask, “are you interested in all of these characters, or did you lose interest in my book because of the large cast?” Sometimes the right decision is to cut a point of view character or introduce them later in the story once readers are more solidly sold on your story.

How many POVs do you utilize in your book? How did you choose to introduce them?

Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.

I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!

Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…