Princes and strategists, martial champions and war heroes, grit, sweat, brawls, and schemes. Since the beginning of time, we have told stories about the best and worst of men – from myths and epics, to action and adventure classics, to modern superheroes and fantasy rogues, such stories have touched hearts across language barriers and millennia.
So why are they hard to find on bookshelves today?
Let’s take a look at the modern publishing market, reader tastes, and my own perspective as a book editor (plus a few obligatory caveats):
These are 8 of my favorite books of all time. Notice any commonalities?
All of these stories are about men (and boys) – clever, dangerous, heroic, stalwart men. Some are written for general audiences, while others go all in on the “bro vibes.”
Each tale contains passion and violence, loyalty and steadfast friendships, promises broken and kept, strategic and psychological contests, and a mix of wit and heartbreak. The ones that have stood the test of centuries reveal great truths about the human condition.
There’s something else I’ll point out though. The most recently published of these 8, Virtuous Sons (read my review) and Theft of Swords, were both self-published first, and only picked up by publishers after finding great success. The same is true of the wildly popular Cradle series by Will Wight and the Dungeon Crawler Carl series by Matt Dinniman.
2 more of my favorites, The Hands of the Emperor by Victoria Goddard (read my review) and Paranoid Mage by InadvisablyCompelled, have continued to gain momentum as self-published works.
It’s not like we have a net shortage of books about boys and men – that’s the majority of what’s been published for all of human history. But, naturally, modern readers gravitate toward books written in a modern voice – we want new ones.
If I, as a female reader, am irritated by the lack, I can’t imagine how frustrating it must be for male readers, especially boys and young men who are developing their taste for reading!
Big publishers don’t want boy books – they’re wrong
But the Big 5 publishers don’t want to publish “boy books” anymore. Many will deny there’s even such a thing as a “boy” book, or that there shouldn’t be (“that’s not inclusive!!!”).
I strongly disagree with all 3 statements:
I want to see boy books published – I want to read them! And edit them. And market them to more readers who will love them.
There’s definitely such a thing as a book by, for, and about men/boys, that male readers enjoy more than female readers (not that girls can’t as well – I’m a woman and you just saw my favorites list). That doesn’t change the fact that at the core, they are bro books.
There should be boy books. Stories that feel like they were written just for you are incredibly powerful! Everyone should have the chance to read stories that delight and resonate with the deepest parts of our soul. If that means reading books about people that are like you… well, duh.
Modern publishing has a chicken and egg problem. They claim they don’t publish as many books about male main characters because male readers don’t buy books as much as female readers.
Male readers respond thusly: “We’ve stopped buying your books because you won’t publish the types we actually want to read.”
There are thriving indie publishers and reading communities online for action and adventure books that are just straight up fun – no identity politics, no need for sensitivity readers – just cool dudes running around with swords. Virtuous Sons, published initially as a web novel on Royal Road, received over 4 million views.
In the past, before the digital age and the advent of self-publishing, books published by the Big 5 were the only option. If you weren’t reading them, you weren’t reading. In their elitism, the Big 5 have refused to adjust their attitude. They blame their potential buyers rather than their own business model. But men are reading. They’re just taking their time and money elsewhere.
And why wouldn’t they, when their tastes are being insulted?
No, I have no interest in reading any of the “adventure fantasy” books on Amazon with grotesquely proportioned anime pinup girls spilling across the covers. No more than I want to read any of the romantasy featuring glowering, glistening, shirtless shifters.
But male readers (and female ones) are told they’re stupid or backward for wanting to read books about male heroes running around killing dragons, clearing dungeons, leveling up with ridiculously powerful magic, sitting around with their comrades swapping scar stories, and chasing (and getting) the girl at the end.
You’re not stupid. Those are great stories. Some are just good stories – that’s ok too.
What I’m NOT saying
Because everyone gets triggered so easily these days, let me tell you what I’m not saying.
I’m NOT saying that girl books are stupid, or that female authors shouldn’t write the stories they want to tell, or that female characters are worse than male characters, or that if a book can’t appeal to a male audience too, it shouldn’t be published, or that female characters can’t compel male readers etc. etc. etc.
I’m certainly not saying that for a book to be truly great, it needs to be by, for, or about men.
But the publishing industry needs to stop saying the opposite. Stop telling (white) male authors that it’s their duty to step aside and “stop taking up the limelight already so that others can have their turn.” Stop telling authors that their stories are “too male-centric” and that unless they have at least one female POV/main character, their book won’t even be considered. Stop telling male authors that strong, masculine, confident male protagonists are inherently problematic.
Write boy books!
I want to read your boy books! Even more so, I want to read your “men books” – with characters worthy of the tag “epic.” So please write them (whether you’re a male or female author)!
If you’re also on the hunt for modern bro books, you’re not alone. Guess what my most popular blog post is? By a massive margin.
There is demand. Don’t let people tell you otherwise.
And if you’re a male author looking for a book editor, but are feeling a bit querulous after discovering that almost all book editors are women, you don’t have to worry that I’m going to treat you like a tasteless jerk for “having the audacity to think a story deserves to be told about a male main character who starts out as kind of a jerk.”
Characters are supposed to have weaknesses. There wouldn’t be a story if your characters didn’t have to grow and change.
Neither does a male protagonist have to be the most profound, unique character ever written in order to make a good story that readers will buy. The female protagonists in most modern books sure aren’t.
I would be delighted to read your story, review it, and perhaps even work with you to edit it into the best it can be.
So keep writing about brave boys and mighty men!
Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.
I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!
Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…
So, your editor has sent you the manuscript assessment for your story, and it’s a good 10+ pages long. It’s packed with useful feedback, some tough suggestions, and market advice you may never have thought of. You’re probably feeling excited, thoughts whirling, but also a little intimidated about where to start. It’s a lot to consider all at once.
The last thing I’d want is to complete a manuscript assessment for an author, only for them to sit and stare at their draft, with no idea what to edit first. And that’s not the author’s fault!
Think about it. You were taught (or learned through experience) how to write and how to accept and incorporate feedback from other writers or beta readers. If no one teaches you how to break down a long editorial report into steps you can implement in page-to-page editing, it’s little wonder you might feel stuck or overwhelmed.
So here are 8 tips for self-editing your book using the developmental feedback found in a manuscript assessment:
Note: if you haven’t received a manuscript assessment, but are reading this article to determine how helpful it might be to acquire one, I recommend you check out this sample manuscript assessment I completed for one of my author clients.
1. Reorganize Feedback into a Simple Checklist
I tend to organize my manuscript assessments by topic:
Character arcs
Plot
Structure and pacing
Opening, mid-point, ending
Writing style
Marketability
More
However, this might not be the most helpful form of organization for you to refer to quickly while editing. You could rearrange feedback into a chronological checklist.
For instance, in my section on characters, I may offer the following feedback: “I immediately related to the characters, but drifted emotionally from them in the middle of the story when they lost sight of their goals, but was moved by how they pulled through in the ending.” I might also say of writing style: “The first half of your story contained a heavy amount of passive voice and some awkward sentence structure, but your writing improved over the course of the manuscript.”
You could then pull out feedback suggestions and organize them into an editing checklist:
Act 1 Edits: – Active voice – utilize a thesaurus to vary verb choice – Sentence structure – sign up for a free trial for a grammar program (like ProWritingAid) to highlight my most common problems with sentence structure – Reexamine my turning point moving from Act 1 into Act 2 – compare it to what I did in the opening hook – how can I strengthen it to propel readers into the middle of the story with greater character clarity?
If another method of organization is more intuitive to you, then go for it! The idea is to pull out the common threads and compile them into a quick reference sheet that you can work through methodically.
2. “Pants” it!
Or, you could just throw organization to the wind and start where you’re most excited! If you’ve already rewritten your opening more times than you want to count and you dread editing it AGAIN, then skip to the part you WANT to write.
Don’t worry about the whole manuscript. Pick one scene that you have a ton of new ideas for, and start playing with it. It doesn’t have to be the chapter that needs the most work, or the scene that’s most important to the story as a whole.
I hope you can still have fun! Even if editing isn’t your favorite part of the writing process. It’s so important to remember why we even do this. Cling onto the joy of your story!
3. Make small edits that affect larger patterns
Complete a read-through with an eye out for small choices that contribute to consistent problems or patterns. For example, if I tell an author that their protagonist often comes across as whiny and disrespectful, I will mention several specific scenes where this problem was most apparent to demonstrate what I mean. But I won’t list every single instance.
That’s what a developmental edit is for – in a full edit I would highlight each time the character’s attitude appeared problematic and offer suggestions for improvement. But after an assessment, it’s up to you to read through your work again, watching for others ways such problems may appear.
The same is true for any issue your editor mentions was consistent throughout your story – the dialogue was drawn out, the descriptions were confusing, the action scenes felt clunky, etc.
This is where an editing checklist can come in handy again. If there are problems you know will come up consistently, write yourself a reminder.
In each chapter, check: – MC attitude and speech – Can I trim dialogue? – Read descriptions out loud to see if I stumble over them. Rewrite and trim for clarity.
4. Brainstorm with Friends
Get a second or third opinion from writer buddies and beta readers, especially regarding feedback that is hard for you to hear. It’s difficult to maintain emotional distance from a story that’s so close to your heart. So how will you know which editorial suggestions you should definitely implement, and where you can trust your own instinct as a writer?
That’s where additional feedback can help! Talk it out with a friend. Share the editorial advice you received and ask them what they think. Even if you can’t find a critique partner for your entire project, you could find people who are willing to look at a few chapters.
When you start hearing the same thing from different readers of your genre (that distinction is vital), you’ll gain more confidence and clarity about the necessary changes.
5. Decide What Feedback to Reject
Decide what feedback you want to accept and what you don’t. You’re not going to agree with everything your editor says, and that’s ok. There may be things your editor doesn’t know about later books in your series, or you could just love the way you have something and not want to change it. Editing is a collaborative process.
Of course, don’t reject professional suggestions out of hand. Some changes won’t feel fun, but really will strengthen your story.
But you might come up with alternate ways to address a problem your editor raises. Suggestions are just that. They’re meant to be helpful, not to pigeon-hole you or kill your creative spirit and voice.
Trust your instinct! Don’t pain over everything. If there are gut decisions you can make after going through the assessment, write them down on a “do” and “don’t” list, and move on.
This is one way that editing with a manuscript assessment can be more efficient than working from a developmental edit! All of your feedback is in one place, so you can read through it and make your “yes”/”no” list quickly, without first having to re-read through individual comments on your entire manuscript.
6. Ask Your Editor Questions
If you’re stuck, feel free to reach out to your editor again! I always invite authors to send me follow-up questions, and surprisingly few do. Perhaps they’re being considerate of my time, which I appreciate. After all, if I ended up offering writing coaching, I should bill for that time. But I consider follow-up questions to be part of the manuscript assessment service. It’s not hard to answer a few questions over email.
I also really enjoy talking about the stories I’ve worked on! Sometimes I’m actually disappointed when the author doesn’t have anything to say after I return my work, because I’m invested in their story and so curious and excited to see how they develop it further! You love talking about your book – so do I!
Of course, you could ask for a one-off coaching session. Or, if you feel like you need more detailed edits on a “problem section,” you could hire your editor to work on certain chapters. Not all editors will agree to edit “a-la-carte” like this, but some do, especially if they’ve already read your entire manuscript and understand the context.
One of my clients, for whom I completed a manuscript assessment, later hired me to edit his action scenes, as that was an area of weakness I had highlighted. He decided it wasn’t worth it to struggle over them – it wasn’t one of his strengths. So we worked on those portions together. It’s a great way to stay within budget, while still ensuring your work meets the standards you want.
7. Allow Yourself to Take Breaks
You might think, “but I’ve already been on a break, waiting to get my assessment back. I should jump back in now.” Not necessarily. You can allow some time for the ideas to percolate.
It’s hard to open yourself up to feedback on your story, which is your precious baby! It’s ok to take a breather, go read or write something purely for fun, and then come back to the assessment once your creative juices are flowing again.
Often, I offer reading suggestions to authors in my assessments – whether standout works in your genre, comparative titles I think could help you pitch your book, or writing resources.
It’s better to do something productive or uplifting than stress yourself out or do nothing at all!
8. Make a Plan Against Procrastination
The longer you put off getting started, the harder it’ll feel to go back and look at that editing list again. Try to set a schedule, set aside a consistent time to write, and make some personal deadlines.
This often works best when you have a writing buddy who can help hold you accountable! Try swapping each newly edited chapter with a critique partner once a week or biweekly. Your speed of editing isn’t important, but chipping away at your project little by little IS – or it’ll never happen.
This is general writing advice. If you had the self-discipline to finish and edit a draft, and send it to an editor, then you’ve learned some great habits over the years! Apply what you know of yourself as you use your manuscript assessment, even if the process feels different from how you’ve worked in the past.
If you’ve edited your novel using the feedback from a manuscript assessment, what worked best for you? What didn’t? Reach out – we’d love to add your advice as an author into this post!
Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.
I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!
Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…
Are you an author who speaks English as a second language? Welcome! Whether you’re dreaming of publishing your book with a North American publisher, or looking to translate your novel into English to reach a wider audience, our team would love to support you.
First of all, I’d like to enforce the value of submitting your book to the English-speaking publishing market. According to data reports, books written in English make up between 1/3 to 1/2 of all global book sales.
In 2024, book sales in North America accounted for 33% of the global book market’s revenue. Europe accounted for a share of over 25% of worldwide book revenue.
Publishing your book in the English language will position your work in front of the largest demographic of book buyers in the world. A potentially lucrative choice!
Publishers and agents in these marketplaces are happy to accept the work of ESL authors from around the world, as long as your work holds up to industry standards. This means your work needs to be indistinguishable in quality from writing by native speakers.
Common English as a Second Language Errors
English is a hot mess! Native speakers admit it freely. The grammar is confusing, and it’s even harder to get the idioms right – for instance have you heard the phrase “hot mess” before? 😉
As an editor, I often see the same types of mistakes in writing by non-native English speakers:
Omission or incorrect use of articles such as a, an, the
Subject-verb agreement
Incorrect order of adjectives
Improperly used verb tenses
Overuse of passive voice and transitional phrases
Unclear sentence structure
Use of descriptors that don’t quite fit the context
A manuscript that contains basic errors like this will not appear marketable to an agent or publisher. Even if your English skills are exceptional, native speakers might still sense a stiffness to your style.
Working with a native English speaker will transform your novel, eliminating common errors and smoothing out cultural idiosyncrasies that you may not be aware of.
Editing Your Novel
I love working with global authors! You bring a unique perspective and style to storytelling which can be refreshing and exciting for native English-speakers to experience. As a reader, I am so incredibly blessed to have access to books from around the world that have been translated into my native language!
It’s been my privilege to work with authors from:
China
Central America
Ghana
Austria
Ethiopia
Types of projects I accept:
Manuscripts written in English by advanced or fluent ESL authors
Manuscripts that have been professionally translated into English and need a second look
Speculative fiction (sci-fi, fantasy, fairy tale and mythic retellings, etc.) is my specialty. I am also familiar with the mystery and thriller genres.
Projects I do not accept:
Manuscripts written by authors who are at the beginner or intermediate ESL level and still need significant language instruction
Manuscripts that have been translated with Google Translate, other AI, or a non-native English speaker
Nonfiction (excepting memoirs)
I would love to be able to work with all authors, but below a certain level of language proficiency, authors would benefit more from further language and writing instruction. A professional edit is a significant investment – it’s best to wait until your work is truly ready.
Self-Editing Support
I encourage you to take advantage of grammar and editing programs like ProWritingAid (both free and paid options available)! They highlight mistakes, but also explain each error, teach you the matching rule, and offer editorial suggestions. Unlike programs like Grammarly, ProWritingAid is designed for creative writing, not business or academic writing, and so they have better stylistic suggestions.
Running your work through programs like this can help you eliminate a lot of the more common mistakes, like absent articles, which will reduce the amount of time your editor needs to spend on later drafts – saving you money!
WARNING: Please be very careful not to write using AI! That is a sure way to get your work rejected by publishers. ProWritingAid offers suggestions for how to rewrite sentences. Do NOT just copy/paste them into your text. These programs are wonderful as a learning tool, but if you let them think for you, your writing skills will not improve.
How to Get Published in North America
Please note that while my team offers book publishing services to authors, including coaching, editing, self-publishing support, and marketing, Creative Cornerstones is not a publishing house or agency. We also do not offer translation services.
I would be delighted to edit your novel to maximize its quality and increase your likelihood of finding representation. I have worked with 2 publishing companies – Monster Ivy Publishing and Havok Publishing – and can advise you on the expectations of the publishing market in the United States.
Even native English speakers are increasingly hiring freelance editors before querying agents, because they know how competitive the industry is. In an attempt to cut costs, publishers are much more likely to accept a book that has already undergone developmental editing than one that needs significant rewrites.
Traditional publishing in the United States is dominated by the Big 5 Publishers:
Penguin Random House
HarperCollins
Macmillan Publishers
Hachette Book Group
Simon and Schuster
Each company operates many imprints – subsidiary publishing companies that they have acquired or created to specialize in certain sub-genres or audiences.
These companies are businesses looking to profit, so they seek books with mass appeal. They only offer deals for books they think will sell tens of thousands of copies – at least. If you’re seeking publication with a traditional publisher, you will first need to gain the representation of a literary agent.
For more information about finding a literary agent, I highly recommend Gina Kammer’s course on querying – she has over 15 years of experience in publishing and offers exceptional coaching to authors.
Other publishing options include mid-size and independent publishers, and self-publishing. I discuss these different routes in greater detail in the following article.
Ready to take your book to the next level?
I would love to hear more about your story and discuss how we could work together to make your book stand out in the crowd!
You are welcome to send me the first chapter of your book – I will complete a free sample edit on your first 1000 words and provide my recommendation for the type of edit your manuscript needs.
You can find a breakdown of the different types of editing – developmental, line, copy – here. Feel free to reach out to my team with any other questions as well!
Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.
I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!
Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…
I recently picked up an epic fantasy book I had greatly anticipated reading – it promised unusual worldbuilding, an intricate plot, and a unique authorial voice. I didn’t make it through the first chapter.
In the opening, the main female character gets drunk, breaks into someone’s home to commit adultery, assaults the homeowner when he tries to stop her, and gets thrown in jail. When she wakes up, she bangs on the bars and yells at the guards to let her out, as though she’d done nothing wrong. A stranger, who greatly outranks her, bails her out and gets her acquitted because he wants to hire her. She struts out like she owns the place, doesn’t offer this man a single thank you, and instead mouths off at him, becoming offended that he expects her to work off her debt to him!
That’s when I stopped reading. I was astounded we were supposed to find this character likeable. Or even admire her defiant attitude and the gargantuan chip on her shoulder.
Unfortunately, this is the exact type of character readers can expect to see over and over again, advertised as a “strong female lead.”
I would use another word: cocksure. I’m sorry if you find that crass, but that’s the point – that’s exactly what these characters are.
The Double Standard
How is it that the word I’ve found to best describe these “strong female characters” has largely been used in the past to describe men being jerks? It’s pretty much the old word for “toxic masculinity!” If a male character acted the way these female characters do, that’s exactly what they’d be called! No, if they acted half so horribly, they would never have made it past a publisher’s slush pile. Instead, we would have seen acquisitions editors tweeting about how triggered they felt.
I’m glad that publishing has enacted a higher standard for male characters! So many male “heroes” in books do treat everyone around them terribly, break their word, kill and torture without remorse, look out only for themselves, emotionally abuse their friends, abandon their families, and drink, swear, and fight with impunity. It continues to horrify me that stories like Prince of Thorns were ever published, and I’m relieved that publishers would reject such books today.
But I don’t want to read about hubristic, “antihero” women any more than I want to read about sociopathic, egotistical men. So why is this behavior seen as not just acceptable, but “cool” when enacted by women?
It shouldn’t be, for two reasons. But before I get into why, let’s define our terms.
“Toxic” or “Sinful?”
I’m a Christian, and I’m fine with using the phrase “toxic masculinity” because men are sinners, and like all sinners, glorify their sin as right. The world’s version of a “strong man” is extremely different from God’s version, and yes, it’s often toxic. Greed, rape (jokes), idolatry, and violence are all sins that God condemns. In the Bible, the “men after his own heart,” are faithful, humble, selfless, obedient to his law, self-controlled, and gracious. This is “righteous masculinity,” nothing like the “locker room boasters” which our culture has seen as cool (in the past). And praise God for the men who seek to be made anew in such a way!
When women call out “toxic masculinity,” I feel a lot of compassion for people who are often coming from non-Christian households. They’ve never met a godly man in their life, and they don’t have the words to explain why their relationships feel so wrong. So they use terms given to them by mental health professionals.
However, I know that many modern* feminists also use the phrase “toxic masculinity” to assert that the idea of gender differences and the existence of masculinity are in themselves toxic. I reject that claim and do not use the phrase in such a way.
*Early feminists were wonderfully brave women who championed equal rights under the law and were almost all Christians, so please be careful if you’re tempted to make blanket denigrating statements about feminists. I encourage you to read about the different “waves” of feminism to understand how/when things went wrong.
Our culture also praises the sins of women, glorifying selfish, petty, greedy, cruel speech and actions as “subversive, bold, driven, audacious, or strong.” We could refer to this as “toxic femininity,” and indeed if we are going to call out sinful masculinity, then we should be willing to do the same for sinful versions of femininity.
Though perhaps it’d be much better if we dropped this phrase entirely, in favor of biblical language. The Bible uses different words than “toxic”:
Righteous or wicked Godly or ungodly Integrity or crookedness Alive in Christ or dead in sin The wise or the fools
What does Proverbs tell us about what it looks like to live a righteous life?
The righteous hate what is false, but the wicked make themselves a stench and bring shame on themselves. The heart of the righteous weighs its answers, but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil. The righteous detest the dishonest; the wicked detest the upright.
Proverbs 13:5, 15:28, 29:27
I yearn to read about main characters who are considered heroes because they are righteous, not because they are wicked!
How dare publishers act as though they’ve made a stand for morality, only to turn around and espouse those same evils when committed by people like themselves! And these new heroes aren’t even well written.
Most “Strong Female Characters” Are Badly Written
It wasn’t just a shift in culture that led to a decline in the “toxically masculine” character. Publishers just started pointing out that such characters are often badly written and make for flat stories. Which is true.
Contemporary female leads, like many stereotypical male leads in older books (prophesied farm boy), are often 2-dimensional, cut-and-pasted copies of each other. Handing a girl a sword doesn’t give her a personality, though apparently it gives the author an excuse not to develop one. The most noticeable things about them, aside from their superior talent and skills, are their entitlement, aggression, arrogance, and air of martyrdom. When the story starts, they are the universe’s gift to humanity, and when the story ends, they are the universe’s greater gift to humanity.
Readers see very little character development, with the exception of “healing” from whatever injustice the world has perpetrated against the main character. There are no personal flaws they need to face and overcome. Everything is someone else’s fault. This makes for extremely boring storytelling. It breaks the cardinal rule of character development.
Everyone who’s taken an intro to creative writing course knows the joke about “the frat boy who signed up to get an easy humanities credit”: The guy writes a story about a perfectly handsome, intelligent, desirable young man who breezes through all his problems and gets the girl who wrongly rejected him before. The professor has to explain that a good (and realistic) story needs flawed protagonists (not the same as morally grey) and problems that they can’t immediately overcome. This creates tension in the plot and spurs development in the character. Usually, the new writer resists, because their character is actually a self-insert and they feel personally attacked at the implication that they have flaws.
These points are no less true for female writers and female characters. In fact, these days male writers are much more likely to accept feedback when you tell them their character needs work – I know, I’ve worked with quite a few developing male writers. But female writers are likely to get up in arms if anyone criticizes how unrealistic or entitled their female characters are. Because these authors are often living out their dreams of being able to get away with literal crime, say whatever they want to the men in their life, and be respected and taken seriously for it.
And, predictably, the characters and plot of these stories suffer for it. Yet publishers will ignore these obvious problems when they’re seen in female characters, because they too are fantasizing about walking around like god and being worshiped for it – as all sinful humans do.
Which brings me to the second reason why we should reject “toxic femininity” – the glorification of unrighteous women – in books.
Bad Ideology, Bad Examples
The version of femininity which is portrayed in so many of these stories is not something I want to embody. I don’t find these women strong. They are not good role models. Most of them are angry, bitter, self-absorbed individuals who hate authority, are isolated from healthy community and family, and listen to no one but themselves. They are unrighteous and thoroughly broken.
These characters embody everything that women have called out as wrong in male behavior. At least modern feminists have gotten more honest. Their actual message is, “men shouldn’t play god, but women are god.” I suppose these books sell because fallen people do relate to this desire. I don’t know why anyone is shocked – this is the oldest sin there is.
“You will be like God, knowing good and evil.”
Yours truthlessly, Satan
That’s the message publishers are selling to girls: “you can be like god.” Girls down these books like cheap shots, craving temporary gratification in place of the answer that will truly quench their thirst. Such stories can never satisfy, because they run in direct opposition to the Great Story, which tells of a plain, humble, kind man doing what is right and vanquishing evil at great cost to himself, for the sake of others.
This doesn’t mean I only want to read stories about knights saving damsels in distress from dragons, though the trope is justifiably iconic (pun intended)! This is one major reason why I personally prefer reading about male mc’s.
But I do want Queens who save their kingdom from evil. Yes, give me heroines running around in capes and busting out martial arts moves. I need to read stories about female strategists, inventors, explorers, and more. AND I want to read stories about mothers, sisters, shy girls, bookworms, wives, and any other profession out there.
SO LONG as all these women first and foremost embody integrity, kindness, faithfulness, humility, goodness, and other signs of godly character. So long as her flaws and mistakes are actually portrayed as problematic and she actively wrestles to overcome them!
We have beautiful examples to guide us!
Noah’s wife cared for her family through the ending of the world, Abigail defied her wicked husband, Ruth braved the wilderness and poverty for love, Esther faced the emperor of the known world head on, Mary encountered an eldritch creature with who knows how many eyeballs and sang for joy. Jael and the woman of Thebez smashed open the heads of villains with household implements!
The woman of Thebez wields her deadly millstone
These are strong women, brave women, faithful women – women after God’s own heart.
Don’t believe the world’s picture of femininity. It is toxic. It is the way that leads to death. I urge you not to write self-absorbed, 2D, arrogant female OR male characters, but to look at the truth of God’s word and write stories that would please him and better teach us how to hear his story.
P.S. If anyone wants to make a biblical argument in favor of the descriptor “toxic,” I’m all ears (Matt 16:6). After all, a little Axe body spray goes a long way. 😉
Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.
I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!
Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…
Being an author is a super difficult journey, and so is being a mom! So how can we do both (and well)? I’m not a mother myself (yet!), but I just spent a precious 2 weeks with my newborn nephew, and have been pondering what my future will look like.
So I reached out to over 20 writer moms to hear how they parent and write at the same time! They offered some specific wisdom, compassion, and anecdotes which I wanted to share with you too. Be sure to check out their books or social pages to support author moms!
Dedicated to my dear friend Stephy (who is an adorable mom!): I know you’ll publish your stories one day! I’m rooting for you!
“Just rethink what counts as writing, honestly. Absorbing fiction books to store away ideas for later is writing. Reading craft books is writing. Having a newborn is exhausting and time consuming, and a huge learning curve. Be kind to yourself, and remember this is only a season, it will be over way too soon. Also remember that your fellow writers understand. Nobody is expecting a new mom to publish anything right away.”
“This is a verse that came to me back in fall 2023, while I was writing one of my novels. Rev 21:5: “He who was seated on the throne said, ‘I am making everything new!’ Then he said, ‘Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.'” God renews us. He makes everything new. That meant even on my weariest and most stressful of days, he could still do things with me and my writing. So that’s a verse that has given me incredible hope.”
Dedicate Yourself Fully to Each Season in Your Life
“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to be silent and a time to speak.”
Ecclesiastes 3
“I wrapped my identity a little around being a writer as a young woman, but marrying a Marine, having a kid, moving around out of my “safety net” of being close to family so I often had to do things alone… I took a very long break. But when it was time to get started again, when the season was right, and I was just like, “Okay, now,” it rose to meet me. Sometimes we’re not in the season we want or we want it all at once. It’s good to embrace the pauses as well as the progress.”
“Invest in your family and marriage. Writing will always be there, but your kids will not. You don’t want to miss out on your little ones growing up, or even worse, your kids believing that writing took you away from them. Find balance. Write during naps, early mornings, or after bed. Limit your words to 500 a day so you can be present with your family. Put off publishing until they are older (I did this).
And don’t forget your spouse. If you want a thriving marriage, don’t put your spouse on the back burner. The worst thing is to achieve all you desired as a writer, only to look around and realize you’re alone. Yes, some sacrifices must be made to become a writer. Don’t let your family be one of them.”
“I keep telling myself this is a season, and someday I will have more time to write again. Right now, my babies need me more than I need to write, so for now, I am content with that. But I keep writing down ideas and brainstorming and daydreaming and hope that in those moments of writing, no matter how few and far between or close together, that all the mental plotting will pay off as I get words on the page.”
“I have three kids aged 3 and under and I’m still figuring this out. It’s helped me to become okay with being in a season where I don’t write much if at all sometimes. Right now, I write for joy when I can. Lately it’s worked really well to get up early, have my coffee and read the Bible, and then write until the kids wake up.”
Rosemary Johnson
Write When the Kids are in Bed!
“For me, I usually post social media posts before my girls wake up in the morning (I usually don’t get up that much earlier, but it helps me feel productive as a writer first thing). I have a 5.5 and a 2 year old, so my oldest does go to school for half days. When she is at school and my youngest naps, I use that time to write or edit (if im lucky that’s 2 hours every afternoon). Then my girls go to bed at 7pm, so I usually try my best to write or read every evening (usually another 2ish hours).
On the weekends, my husband and I take turns being productive/watching the girls so the other can have a longer period to be productive. I usually try not to work on writing or author stuff while my girls are awake. That’s a personal decision tho haha and it changes and depends on the age of your babies. I get a ton of writing done with a newborn, but I know that’s not the same for others haha.”
Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might, for in the realm of the dead, where you are going, there is neither working nor planning nor knowledge nor wisdom.
Ecc 9:10
“I’m going to come back and edit this comment once I’m done cooking dinner, lol! EDIT: I am finally back (made/cleaned up dinner, chasing kids, getting ice cream with my bro who is in town for work, and feeding a baby…phew!).
I have two kiddos, one is 2.5, the other is almost 4 months. It’s hard to get anything done. My toddler likes to follow me everywhere, and while my baby is amazing, she is still a baby. I don’t know that I have any of this figured out yet, but right now, I typically write at night once they’re in bed, so my writing time can range from 10 min – 2 hours depending on how tired I am. It’s very slow going right now, but I’m trying to get back into typing on my phone while putting the baby to sleep.”
“Do you see someone skilled in their work? They will serve before kings; they will not serve before officials of low rank.”
Proverbs 22:29
Stick to a Schedule!
“I’m a homeschooling mom of three kids, ages 12, 8, and 3. I’ll be fully honest. It was pretty overwhelming to be pregnant or dealing with a younger baby and write at the same time, so I took a lot of breaks during those seasons. Otherwise, my older kids would buddy up to play outside, and I wrote while my youngest napped. I keep my kids on a routine/schedule so that they sleep roughly about the same time every night. This allows me to do at least 1-1.5 hours of writing/editing every morning before anyone else is up.
I used to live near my parents, who could provide childcare, and that allowed me to get even more writing done. But now that I’ve moved across the country, my writing time is pretty scarce. All the more critical that I stay on my schedule.”
“For me, early mornings are non-negotiable if I want to get anything done. I go to bed early and get up around 4:30 or so. I struggle with brief sprints, so I really treasure having a solid 1.5 hours or so to sit and focus on writing. I can get a decent amount done, and it makes me feel so “free” throughout the rest of my crazy mom/homeschooling day.
Proverbs 31 is a great chapter to look at for moms who are also writers! We can be industrious while still taking care of our homes and families. It can be tough to balance, but I’m thankful Scripture makes it clear that it’s possible to do both well.”
“She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.”
Proverbs 31:25
Multitask or “Drive-By Writing”
“Our dining room was in the exact center of the house. I put my laptop on the table and made a rule for myself that I had to write 1 sentence every time I passed it. That got me to my 1000 words a day goal and I never stopped to work for more than a minute or two.”
“I first started writing seriously again when I had a nine month old and a 4 year old. Now they’re 17 and 14 and … usually are ignoring me. I basically just wrote whenever I could. As they got a little older, were sleeping through the night, and had a said bedtime, I’d usually put them to bed at 8 and then write for an hour every night. I also wrote waiting for their gymnastics class to end, in doctor’s waiting rooms, on park benches… You just have to grab the time you’re given and go for it.”
“lol I do drive-by writing. I usually have google docs open on my phone and will work on a scene through the day. Most of my writing time is with kids on me or near me. I usually keep my goals low at around 500-1000 words a day. It all adds up.”
“I do drive-by writing! My kids are older (8+), but my laptop and charger live on the counter. If I can squeeze in 15 minutes a few times a day while they’re awake, I call it a success. After food and conversation works best! That goes for all ages.”
Stacey Yaroszeufski
“I did a lot of world building and brainstorming while doing dishes. Especially when listening to inspiring music. 🥰 And while nursing I’d read, critique, chat with other writers, or check social media on my phone. And once the kids were in bed I’d sit with my laptop and type, next to my husband while he played video games or watched a show.”
“Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”
Phil 4:8
“I always keep notes on my phone whenever the muse strikes so that when I do get to my writing time, I’ve got a list of ideas ready to go. I find I get more done in short focused bursts than when I have a whole day to write. I’m more creative when I’m forced to do it quickly. Driving time is also great to think through scenes or identify plot holes.”
“I have a 14, 11, and 9 year old at home, and most of my writing these days is done on my weekly writing nights with RJ Conte—basically we do word sprints for an hour or two and check in with each other to share word counts and snippets of what we’ve written. At the end of the evening we call and read each other what we wrote (if we feel ready to share it). It’s the best!! Doing it once a week is very low pressure but I still get some consistent (slow) progress on projects, and sometimes it gets my momentum going so that I want to keep working on it for days afterward!
I’m by no means a full-time writer. I consider myself more of an artist-hobbyist. But I’m glad to keep creating anyway—I couldn’t create as much as I do without supportive friends! So my advice is to pick a consistent day/time and have an accountability partner or two to team up with. It’s satisfying to at least have some progress each week even in the middle of busy parenting and work!”
“I rely on my husband or outside help like occasionally my mom or one of my brothers to take the kids so I can get more time. I’m lucky that my husband works from home 7-3 and gets the full government parental leave offered here in Canada. Things are a bit hectic right now with a newborn and three other little kids but I fully anticipate lots of writing time later on over the course of his leave.”
“Out of desperation I tried something totally different. Voice to text has been a big help. Then I take 10 to 15 minutes at night to organize it into sections, but I’m still in the planning stage. I have the story outlined, specific dialogue for important scenes, extensive world building, and character sketches. I should be ready to start compiling and do the actual writing next week. It’s far different than the ways I’ve written before, but I’m in a much better place than I’ve ever been. I’m feeling confident that I can actually finish a WIP for the first time. This is working for me, but you do what works for you.”
“I know a lot of moms who use dictation and get a lot of writing done while they’re doing chores around the house! I’ve done that a little bit, I’m dictating this comment right now while pumping breast milk, haha. It will take practice for me to use it more for my actual drafting! But I know others who have had success doing that. I have definitely done it here and there though, a few times dictating for example while making supper in the kitchen or something. Multitasking!”
“Try to have a backup plan to help get around especially chaotic days. For example, I identify my writing time for the day, as well as two potential backup options. This way, if my plans go sideways, I know I have another opportunity waiting for me (even if that’s after they’ve gone to bed). Then I just aim to write for at least 10 minutes, which usually goes a bit longer.”
“I’m a mom of three under 7 and all have varying special/medical needs as well. It is very overwhelming, but also an enormous joy. I try to incorporate the kids in whatever I am doing, from acting out scenes, to listening to a passage, to working on artwork. They are so excited and proud to “help mommy write.” I actually just gave each of them a copy of my latest and signed a message to them thanking them for being my helpers.
They have taken that honor so seriously. And coffee. Coffee is amazing. “
“I homeschool my 10 yr old son and (since he’s full of stories too) we have a section of his school day that is writing a story. I squeeze some words into a notebook then along with him. We also attend a local writer’s group together. “
“Oh, that my words were written! Oh, that they were inscribed in a book! That they were engraved on a rock with an iron pen and lead, forever! For I know that my Redeemer lives, And He shall stand at last on the earth.”
Job 19:23-25
“It’s been really great writing with kids. They are my inspiration. I warned them anything snarky they say can be used in a book. My teen daughter writes too now. She’s working on her third novel. The theme of my book is Psalm 42:11–“Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope thou in God…” And it’s an especially important truth to remember when raising children.
There’ll be times when you’re overwhelmed and need wisdom. So even though the book is fantasy, there are elements of truths I’ve learned along the way in my own life.”
“For the first time ever, I am spending the night in a hotel room to get some writing done. I checked in at 3 PM, wrote for about three hours. Drove to band practice because it’s not far from the hotel I’m staying at, and then when I got back, I wrote for another three hours. The time went by so fast it’s already after midnight. I wrote over 6,000 words in two sittings. I have no one to worry about but myself. I really needed this break because my kids have special needs (they have autism and genetic deletions). I think maybe I need to do this every year for NaNoWriMo. I am astonished at how much I wrote and how the lack of distractions worked on me. Now I must admit, most of the writing is painfully bad but at least I’m writing!”
Alexandra Owen
“My daughter is nearly four. What I have learnt to do is if we do something fun (like lunch out), the deal when we get back is we both get “calm time.” This means she can watch cartoons or play in her room for an hour. I’ve phrased it as part of the deal of getting a treat out. I’ve found if I say I’m doing work, she’ll want my attention for everything. If we are both having calm time, then she seems quite happy to amuse herself.”
Rachael Marie
“I focus on teaching independence to my kids to give myself extra breaks.”
“Personal nutrition is key for having the brain/energy capacity to write. I absolutely have to make sure I eat enough protein if I’m going to have the brain power to write and be creative, which surprisingly at this stage, I often do. I have to take care of my body to take care of my mind…”
“One bible verse I like to reflect on is Matthew 13:34: ‘All these things Jesus spoke in parables to the multitudes: and without parables he did not speak to them.’ Jesus was the ultimate storyteller and this verse proves the value of storytelling!”
“My kids are 2 and almost 4 and writing makes me feel sane, and healthy, and more myself which makes me a better wife and mother and more balanced person. I love that!”
“Truly loving what I do keeps me going. It is a calling for me that I really see the Lord blessing, so writing brings me joy — even when I’m dead tired. My goal is that when someone is reading or hearing something I write, ‘many will see it and fear, and will call upon the name of the LORD.’ This is the desire and motivation that keeps me going, even through the little years of parenting. Whether I’m penning fiction, gospel encouragement, or anything else, I want it to be for His praise, and so that others see Him reflected in whatever I write.”
Comment below with your own advice to support fellow writer moms! Or message our team if you’d like your suggestions and book to be featured!
Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.
I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!
Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about writing and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…
A character has popped into your head, and now you want to write them! How do you develop this character to feel realistic and make readers care about them? Imagine yourself sitting down in a tavern to get to know your character. What kind of questions would you ask them?
To help you get started, I’ve listed beginner questions that go over the basics like appearance, skills, and backstory. Then, some intermediate questions that further examine who your character is and why they behave as they do. Finally, if you’ve been writing for a long time, feel stuck, or are looking for some questions you might not find on other character development sheets, we have some advanced questions that dig further into the psychology of your character.
Use this as a brainstorming resource, but don’t force yourself to answer everything! I encourage you to write down your answers as mini scenes – just listing traits gets boring pretty fast. You can download an editable Word document with all the questions here. Or I like to start a Pinterest/mood board to “collect” my character’s outfits, weapons, and castles! The first rule is have fun!
Stage 1 – Beginner Character Development Questions
These are the bare bones that you need to know as a writer in order to craft a compelling story.
Defining Features
What is their name and what does it mean? (Are their parents actually the type of people who’d give them a profound/unique name?) How do they feel about their name?
What are their physical features? What do they like and dislike about their own body?
How do they dress and groom (makeup, tattoos) and is this important to them?
What are some of your character’s favorite things (foods, clothes, activities, romantic types)?
What are some of their dislikes (phobias, allergies, irritating childhood acquaintances, pet peeves)? What are their dealbreakers?
Status Quo
What does their everyday life look like (job, school, social life)?
What is their socioeconomic status and how does this affect them? How large of a role does money play in their mindset?
What do they like about their current life?
What do they wish they could change?
“Stats”
What’s something your character is good at? Do they like this about themself?
What’s something they’re bad at? Do they dislike this about themself?
What’s their highest level of education or training (in a skill or craft)? How quickly do they learn new things?
Social Circle
Who are their closest friends and family and how healthy are these relationships?
Who are your character’s enemies (or rivals, or people they dislike)? Why?
What are some defining features (traditions, mannerisms, habits) of their culture of origin?
Do they like or dislike their culture (hate big family gatherings, like greeting people with a kiss, chafe under strict hierarchies etc.)?
How do other characters perceive your mc on average (e.x. the town clown, the teacher’s pet, the eccentric recluse)?
Inner Life
What is your character’s driving goal, desire, or need?
What makes your character laugh?
What makes them cry?
What makes them angry?
How do they demonstrate intense emotions (lash out, suppress it, talk it out)?
Stage 2 – Intermediate Character Development Questions
Here, we start to get into greater detail, fleshing out what you already know. The reader doesn’t need to know all of these facts, but they will affect how you write the character. In fact, many of these details will enhance a story most if they are not explicitly stated, but shown over time as a pattern of behavior. Don’t tell the reader your mc will start a fight with someone who makes them feel stupid, but remains calm when hangry – show us and let us draw our own conclusions.
Environment
What is their dwelling place like and what makes them feel most at home (luxurious, homey, full of people, quiet, near nature, etc.)?
How important are possessions and ownership to them (are material items important, do they keep heirlooms and collections, are they a minimalist)?
How in tune are they with their surroundings? Do they notice shifting details?
Personality (Behavioral Patterns)
What is their personality type (use any common personality test or get started with the questions below)? How comfortable are they around strangers and do social interactions drain or enliven them? Do they make decisions based primarily on emotion or logical reasoning? Are they rule abiding or free spirits? Do they perform better in structured settings or with flexibility? Are they better at street smarts or book smarts? Are they a motivated worker and curious learner?
^TIP: Be aware of how your own personality affects how you write characters. I’ve read characters who were supposed to be outgoing, but spent most of their time (even in group situations) internally thinking about what was going on around them – that’s an introverted behavior which the author likely defaulted to out of familiarity.
What’s your character’s love language?
How do they behave when pushed to the brink (exhausted, grieving, in pain, hungry, trapped)? Do they have differing responses to varying threats? – E.x. some people respond well to an intellectual challenge, but cave under physical pressure, and vice versa.
Relationships
How do they form relationships with others? – Do they have a lot of friends, or a few deep ones? – Do they take a while to open up to people, or strike up a conversation with everyone they meet?
What are the requirements for joining their inner circle?
How much weight do they put on how other people view them? How much are they motivated by external social pressure?
Are they aware of their reputation? Is their self-image in line with their external one?
Past
What’s a part of their upbringing that they have rejected?
What’s something your character is truly proud of?
What’s something your character deeply regrets?
What’s the worst thing that’s ever happened to them?
What’s something/someone they miss?
Quirks
What’s a unique physical quirk of theirs (birthmark, can or cannot roll their tongue, weirdly flexible in a certain part of their body, fingernails grow super fast)?
What are their physical advantages (5 senses, looks, stamina, great at power-naps)?
What are their physical disadvantages (weak knees, prone to headaches, jittery, natural sprinters – just terrible at long-distance running)?
What are their mental advantages and disadvantages (mental health disorders, intelligence, memory, focus, creativity, problem-solving capacity, executive function ability)?
Habits
Night owl or early bird?
Heavy or light eater?
Do they partake in intoxicating substances? What kind of a drunk are they (flirty, weepy, loud)?
What are their opinions and preferences about sex?
What’s a habit or mistake your character just can’t seem to shake (being late, forgetting things, picking toxic partners)?
Beliefs
What are their deepest beliefs and convictions? – This could refer to religion, ideology, and political alignment, but also to internal codes like “family first,” or “no good deed goes unpunished,” or “every man paves their own way.”
What is their mindset toward death? How was this shaped (personal experience, upbringing)?
What’s something they could not live without? Do they know this about themself? – Many people think they can’t live without their career or a certain part of their identity, only to discover what “truly matters” the hard way.
Has your character ever committed a crime? What is their attitude toward the law?
Stage 3 – Advanced Character Development Questions
Many stories do not take their characters further than stage two. People are more than a list of personality traits, features, and needs, and are certainly more than what we can see in a plot. We learn, but then regress, change, and then change again. People are complex and demonstrate inconsistencies in both thought and behavior. This round of questions seeks to go past “what” and “who” your character is and ask “why?” Digging deeper into your character’s psyche can push your story to become more meaningful, enhancing themes and character arcs.
But sometimes a story is richer for the things the author knows, which take place off the page, but which aren’t necessarily resolved in the book. These are the type of things you might wish to keep as secrets from your readers. Or never fully show – there’s nothing quite so tantalizing as a half-revealed backstory. A great story will spark additional levels of imagination in your readers, because they can sense that your imagination went to greater depths. They’ll chase after you if you give them the seeds for thought.
What is the nature of their character (ethos), and more importantly why? – In the past, people might have asked if a man or woman was of “good character,” referring to the level of integrity, honor, or virtue a person displayed. Today, we might instead ask after a person’s “true colors,” in an attempt to see if someone acts morally or immorally. – Is your character honest or do they lie easily? Do they keep their word or are they flaky? Do they treat others respectfully or degradingly? Do they have a strong work ethic or are they lazy? Are they magnanimous or self-centered? Are they fair and consistent in their dealings with others?
What are some internal inconsistencies in your character’s behaviors, thought-processes, or belief systems?
What does your character get wrong about themself? – People think they understand themselves, and often they don’t. Some people will switch jobs, partners, or homes, only to realize they preferred their old one, but didn’t understand why.
Is your character deliberate about their relational boundaries? How did they learn them? If they have not, are they a pushover, emotionally codependent, callously indifferent to others?
Do your character’s hobbies actually affect how they think and interact with the world on a daily basis? – For instance, if your character is a musician, they’ll likely hum a lot, notice sounds and voices more than others, and make metaphors based around music. An artist will see color and shape in unique ways and go out of their way to see pretty things. An engineer or handyman might collect odds and ends and tinker with things as they sit and talk with friends. It’s not enough to state that your character likes something – it has to actually visibly impact their life and behavior.
How in tune is your character with other peoples’ inner lives? – Are they a good judge of character, sensitive to emotions, and know the right thing to say at the right time, or do they miss the mark, guess at peoples’ motivations, or act on instinct rather than insight?
How well does your character understand themself? – Are they aware of their own capacity for self-insight, or deluded by their vision of themself? – Do they want to understand themself better and actively reflect upon themself?
How do they reconcile with others? – For instance, do they need time to cool off after an argument, or do they want to clear the air right away? Do they want a detailed breakdown showing the other person understood why they were angry, or do they want the other person to make a gesture to make up for it? – How do they make amends when they were in the wrong?
What’s their style of conversation? – Authors can fall into the trap of making all their characters converse in a similar style (to them). But different people converse in a variety of ways. Do they love or hate small talk? Love deep discussions or not want to touch anything personal with a 10 foot pole. People have conversational quirks like: telling the same story over and over again even though people are sick of hearing it, info dumping a lot at once about a topic they find interesting, saying very little for a while and then stunning everyone with something powerful and profound, asking a lot of questions in response to what others say, asking no questions about others but instead replying with a similar anecdote of something that happened to them. – Some people are good listeners, while others won’t shut up about themselves. Some people pause a lot between words, while others talk a mile a minute. Lean into these unique idiosyncrasies! The way people talk (or don’t) to each other can be a huge barrier in relationships and an interesting point of conflict in a story.
How do their unique traits bring out different qualities in their companions? – People respond to others in different ways. Not everyone will love, hate, or laugh around your character. Sometimes a main character comes across as boring not (just) because they’re a reader insert, but because everyone in the story responds to them in the exact same way. In a single group, your main character might bring out courage in one individual, belligerence in another, and attraction in a third. – The best stories are ones that don’t have only strongly developed characters, but also strongly developed character dynamics. Do these individuals bring out the best or worst in each other? Stories are formed when people clash and bond in unique ways that evolve over time.
Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.
I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!
Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…
Fantasy and science fiction have become more unique and diverse in the past 5 years alone. As a reader, I’m delighted to see a sudden surge of genre blending, plus stories set in non-western places, by authors from all over the world! I keep picking up these books, only to put them down in frustration when the main character doesn’t live up to the concept.
In the past couple years I’ve started and dropped Throne of Glass, The City of Brass, Spin the Dawn, Jade City, The Tiger at Midnight, Empire of Sand, and more despite absolutely loving the worldbuilding and premise of all of them.
I could not resonate with any of the main characters. After trying all of these in quick succession, it occurred to me that I could swap any of the female leads, and I wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. They faced problems the same way, talked smack the same way, and reacted to people and changes with a seemingly identical script.
To those who might protest that I’ve just outgrown these characters (that was my first thought too – it’s been a while since I was 17), I’d remind you that the largest demographic for YA readers is not actually teenagers, but women in their 30s-40s!
As another disclaimer, the most common reason I will drop a book is if the characters don’t catch me. I’ve done this plenty of times with adult books. But I’ve noticed a distinct pattern to why young adult characters in particular can fall flat.
Mashing together all personality traits to maximize “reader-insert” potential
These days, large publishing houses only buy books they can mass market. This means they look for stories and characters with the greatest appeal for the greatest number of people. Unfortunately, this results in characters who seem to embody all major personality traits melded together. After all, you want any reader to be able to insert themself.
Some people love personality tests, others hate them, and most agree that there is little scientific basis to any of them. Regardless of your stance, I’m going to reference the Myers Briggs test to illustrate this point.
The Myers Briggs test breaks personalities into 4 categories where people fall along a scale between two major traits. You’re probably familiar with the scale of introversion/extroversion. Most people fall closer to one than the other. Some people fall right in the middle and call themselves ambiverts, and that’s possible for the other categories in the personality test too. This is where we see great variety in people – after all, even if you share the same “type,” no two people are the same.
But I’ve never once met someone who would say that they fall in the middle for every single trait in this (or another personality) test. But that’s just what most YA characters seem to be – an average of everything.
Let’s break down each personality category for some concrete examples. (I won’t explain the test in much detail below, as that’s not the point of this article, but you can find more information about it here.)
Introversion/Extroversion –
Most YA characters I’ve encountered lately are a bit reserved, with one or two close friends, yet they also have little problem meeting new people, engaging in large groups, or persuading strangers and influential people to their opinion. These characters have a small inner circle, or very little in the way of a social support structure, but this often seems more like a choice, as if the rest of the world is just not as cool as them. But if they only put their mind to it, of course they could be the most popular girl in the room (Katniss).
One of the major problems with this is that the character gets to experience the best of both worlds, without the downsides of either. They don’t get nervous and make awkward mistakes in big groups, and they don’t talk way too much and put people off. This makes for boring character development – a rounded character needs weaknesses. But when you average out extremes of a personality, you avoid a lot of (interesting) problems that could make their story more unique.
Book Smarts/Street Smarts (Intuitive/Sensing) –
Can you pick up knife throwing in a week and best everyone else in your party? But can you also analyze a new political landscape and design a strategy that people 30 years your senior somehow never thought of? Well, most YA characters can do both!
They’re athletic, hands on, and pick up new skills quickly, making their odds of survival great. But they’re also of above-average intelligence and are great at coming up with clever plans on the fly, even in situations they’ve never encountered before.
It’d be more interesting if these characters had one set of skills in which they excelled, and struggled with other areas. Someone who spends their whole life physically training will probably have trouble focusing on a book about the local religion and vice versa.
But while characters often make jokes like, “oh, I’m terrible at math,” or “if our wagon wheel breaks, we’ll be stranded for 3 weeks,” these supposed weaknesses never actually affect the character and plot. They still cobble together practical fixes and have no trouble budgeting their finances while on a mad dash across the kingdom.
Feeling/Thinking (what you Primarily base your decisions on) –
Teenagers are hormonal and emotional, and so many YA characters understandably make their decisions based on their feelings in the moment. Yet, likely because authors don’t want their female characters accused of being “controlled by their emotions,” they feel the need to portray their characters as perfectly aware of all logical routes and just willfully choosing otherwise.
For instance, in a book I recently started, we’re introduced to the FL as she spins a magic spell in a public square. She hates this spell and wants to deviate from her mentor’s instructions. She feels very strongly about this, but looks into her mentor’s eyes, sees the warning, remembers her teacher could abandon and leave her in poverty, or that the king could have her executed for the deviation.
She thinks through all these reasons even as she’s apparently swept up by her own emotions. Then decides, “I’m going to do it anyway.” The spell shatters and she is punished – an entirely avoidable scenario.
More and more, I see scenes like this, where the character creates problems for themselves with stupid decisions. That’s definitely something humans do ALL THE TIME. But these choices are often strangely depicted, not as stupid, but as daring or assertive.
And again, these authors are trying to have the best of both worlds – “oh, yes my character feels very deeply and just gets carried away sometimes – don’t we all? Oh, but she didn’t really get carried away – you see, she thought through every possible problematic outcome first, and just decided to face them all! It’s not like she’s foolish or incapable of controlling herself.” Um… ok?
Again, many teenagers are impulsive as a result of their rapidly shifting hormones, so it’s not too much of a stretch that many YA characters would be perfectly happy to abandon their home on short notice for a new quest. But people still tend to prefer one or the other in their life and day-to-day schedules – flexibility or consistency.
Yet so many of these impulsive characters also fit perfectly fine into more structured scenarios. I need to go undercover at a royal court, which has a rigid set of rules? No problem! I’m not bouncing on the balls of my feet all day – I can keep my cool perfectly in any situation.
Some characters are the opposite – they’ve grown up with the same schedule every day (a farm, the military, a magic school), but when their whole world is upturned, they do just fine.
Sure, they may miss their old life, but they don’t feel lost, agitated, lose sleep or perform more poorly than usual because of this sudden shift which does not suit their needs. Or if they do, they very quickly overcome it, as though it was just a habit, and not one of their core traits as a person.
YA personalities embody everything and nothing
Whether you agree with this way of analyzing a personality or not, the point is, YA characters these days are designed to embody everything and nothing at the same time, so that they will resonate with the most readers.
This is not only unrealistic, but makes these characters exceptionally boring. Where are the unique quirks and flaws that make you laugh and want to talk about a character for years to come?
I have a couple friends who love YA, and it’s struck me that no matter how many YA books they recommend to me, they never say, “oh, I just loved this character because x.” They rarely mention the characters at all. Because most of these books are situational – they’re about what happens, not who is facing these trials.
But do readers actually want characters like this? Sarah J. Mass books are wildly popular after all – so clearly plenty of readers love these stories, but do they really love these characters?
Or do they get swept up in the quick pace and frenetic emotions that define the YA genre, and not realize that if the plot paused, they might not really care about the characters themselves?
Writing Tips: how to avoid this pitfall
Personality tests can be a fun way to analyze your character and make sure you write them with consistent reactions across your stories. It can also help you flag if you’re writing too many characters of the same type. That’s only natural as writers – we write what we’re familiar with and drawn to. But opposites attract and create all sorts of other sparks that make for great stories.
If you’re writing a female young adult character, you may be afraid to give her flaws, especially ones that women have often been accused of, and with good reason. Women are far too often portrayed negatively in fiction. But it’s just as bad when they’re underdeveloped, 2-dimensional, or cut-and-pasted.
If you play it too safe, making your character a little too perfect, too talented, or too generic, you’ll unintentionally be adding to the crowd of flat female characters. Be bold! Give your female characters personalities with more extreme quirks. Some readers may be turned off. Who cares? There should be a space in fiction for all sorts of main characters, not just the brash, aloof Homecoming Queens.
Writers hate on ourselves and compare ourselves way too much to others, so I say this with caution, but it’s worth asking if your character feels too similar to a slew of other heroes. I’m also a marketing professional, and it’s necessary to analyze the market.
If you see a lot of similar characters out there, it can mean they’re in high demand – readers do seek out the same archetypal characters again and again (the antihero, the guy next door, the angsty assassin). But it’s also a sign that your character may not feel original to your readers. Trends do come and go, and if a press has already published a lot of Sarah J. Mass lookalikes, they, and their readers, may be looking for something fresh.
Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.
I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!
Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…
You have to do much more work to get a reader invested
With every major point of view character, authors must check off all the same boxes: establish the status quo, show the individual’s wants and needs, give readers a reason to root for them, and spark off their story with an inciting incident.
With only one POV character, authors can achieve many of these benchmarks within the first few chapters. This period of time is vital to securing reader interest. If you can’t catch them within this time, most readers will not continue.
But with each new POV, authors wipe all their own efforts away by resetting the reader’s emotional slate clean and starting all over again. I may be interested at the end of an opening chapter, but suddenly I’m faced with another stranger that vies for my investment.
Then a third. God forbid 4 or more. It could take an hour to get back to the first character, at which point all the emotional tension has faded and I have to restart in my efforts to connect with them.
Publishers may think multiple POVs offer more likelihood to get readers invested. After all, odds are a reader will like at least one of them. But I think of it the other way around.
Imagine talking to a talented salesperson. They really rope you in, know their stuff, and get you excited. You’re almost convinced about the purchase. But then they add on another product, again nearly persuading you. But then they start talking about a third one! And you have to make a decision on all three purchases at once? That’s overwhelming.
you have to “sell” Readers on all your characters at once
Consider also how your friends and family respond when you talk about your story. Do you know the glazed look they get in their eyes or the uncertain tone in their voice when you start packing on too much information?
You’ve probably learned to share about just one element or character at a time. But a new reader is like these friends – hesitant to try your story and only willing to invest so much time into making up their mind.
The more POV characters you employ, the higher the chance a reader will get worn out before you even reach your inciting incident. After all, you’re yanking their emotions around between many different people and locations, and it will take much longer to reach the “exciting” events which really kick off the story.
Alternatively, one character may have a riveting introduction, while another has a lackluster one. A reader may decide that it’d be too frustrating to go back and forth between one character they love, and one they find uninteresting, and put the book down. I’ve done this before.
Writing Tips for Multiple POV’s
Considering how many published books feature multiple POVs in the market these days, you may not think this will pose much of a problem. After all, clearly many readers are willing to give these books a try, and some even seek them out specifically. Preferences vary, but it is still important to keep in mind that the opening of your book is the most vital time in which to hook a reader.
Read, read, read! Have you read Brandon Sanderson, Robert Jordan, George R.R. Martin, and Ken Liu? They are some of the most popular writers who employ multiple POVs. Was it hard for you to get into these books? When did you lose interest, and what hooked you again? These are the types of elements to emulate or avoid in your own work.
Some authors choose to write multiple chapters back to back from one POV before switching to another. This gives readers more time to become attached to them. Others write shorter chapters but switch POV more often.
Also, remember to rely on your beta readers. It’s hard, but necessary to ask, “are you interested in all of these characters, or did you lose interest in my book because of the large cast?” Sometimes the right decision is to cut a point of view character or introduce them later in the story once readers are more solidly sold on your story.
How many POVs do you utilize in your book? How did you choose to introduce them?
Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.
I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!
Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…
I’d argue that in this day and age, pacing is the number one element authors must nail in their books. Yes, you need quality characterization, writing, and a fun plot. But pacing is what makes the actual process of reading fun.
There’s nothing new under the sun. I’ve read books with the same tropes, archetypes, and types of characters over and over again. What makes them stand out, at a certain point, is style. The “what” matters less than the “how.”
I’ve put down books with great worldbuilding and my favorite kinds of characters because they were too dense, the chapters dragged, they abused cliffhangers, or they handled events and my emotions clumsily.
But how many times have you loved a book with somewhat generic characters and plot simply because the author expertly guided your thoughts and emotions and took you for such a great ride that you “just couldn’t put it down?”
An author’s unique voice can contribute a lot to this feeling, but pacing is what really makes the nitty gritty mechanics of a book come together into an enjoyable experience! To write a well-paced story, there are several things you need to understand:
What makes for “good” story pacing, and how can you ensure your novel has it?
Story pacing has to do with the tempo, energy, and timing of certain story elements, and how you arrange all of these elements together. Both are vital.
Think of one of your favorite songs. I bet there’s a mix of loud and soft moments, major and minor keys, sustained and brief notes. The variety in itself is enjoyable, but the timing is perhaps even more important! We get bored by a song that takes way too long before the first beat drops, and we’ll feel disappointed if there’s not a roaring crescendo at the end.
Check out this image taken from a video editing program – it reveals the “pacing” of the first movement in Beethoven’s famous 5th.
You can see both variety and consistency in the waveforms of the sound itself!
So too, a great story needs a variety of emotional beats, balance between quiet moments and conflict, and careful timing of plot points. So let’s jump in!
3 Types of Story Pacing
There are three main types of pacing and an author must master all of them for a great story.
1. Macro-level Pacing
How well do you pace your entire novel and plot? This is macro pacing. Big picture organization and structure is what most affects pacing at the macro level. I recommend using the 3-Act story structure or the 15 beats method to plan your plot.
These frameworks help you balance how much time you spend in different parts of your story and how you connect scenes and conflicts. They can help you spot if you’re missing something big – like an active villain, relevant side characters, or believable setbacks for your protagonist.
Here are some things to keep in mind as you outline your plot and refine the macro pacing of your story:
Tip 1: Balance act lengths
Is one story act or series of plot points considerably shorter or longer than another?
A long opening can make your book feel slow. An overly packed middle can leave readers confused or bogged down with too much information and too many plot threads. Too abrupt of a denouement can leave readers emotionally unsatisfied.
Tip 2: Vary energy levels
Do you have enough variety between high and low energy moments?
Of course, a detective story or thriller will contain more action scenes than a drama or romance. But you still want to make sure that your reader experiences multiple types of satisfaction. A book that’s “go, go, go,” may miss out on some moments of deeper emotional impact or character growth, while a more cerebral novel can risk feeling repetitive and detached.
Tip 3: Connect plot and emotion
Do your plot threads and emotional threads build upon one another or clash against each other?
It’s hard to weave all the elements of your story together in a way that makes them complement each other, especially when you get into subplots and character relationships. Sometimes an emotional confrontation is more effective after a high-stakes action scene, while other times readers may need to see the main character alone with their thoughts.
There is no perfect formula and it can take a lot of practice and juggling when organizing your book as a whole. But it is vital for the emotions and events to become inseparable from one another.
Think again of Beethoven’s 5th symphony. He doubtless tested countless iterations before he settled on his unforgettable opening. Other arrangements could have worked well, but might not have left the same lasting impact.
Story pacing is about reader experience
In the end, it’s all about the experience of reading your story. What makes someone devour a book in one sitting vs. taking a few weeks to get through it? This kind of pacing is kind of like an “it” factor.
It’s hard to define exactly what makes a book have great pacing, but you know it when you see it. Enticing pacing will make a “good” story “great” and can even make a poor book wildly popular!
Stephanie Meyer’s Twilight series is a prime example of this. The plot is nothing special, and the characters are perhaps deliberately 2-dimensional, but the way Meyer introduces new characters and problems, balancing action scenes and emotional moments, is masterful – like a catchy pop song you can’t get out of your head. And unsurprisingly, the second book in her series, which had the least variety in pacing, was the worst received by fans.
2. Medium-level Pacing
Medium pacing looks at a slightly smaller scale – your chapters. Your novel could have good pacing overall, but if your chapters struggle to work well internally, your book may still fall flat with readers. A multi-course meal may be expertly planned, but will it matter if you don’t knock each dish out of the park?
You’ve likely experienced chapters that felt so long you flipped forward to see how many pages were left. Or you may have been frustrated that some chapters end right as something exciting finally starts to happen – only to switch to a different POV!
Chapter structure can vary more drastically than overall novel structure. One chapter may cover 10 years using a combination of exposition and vignettes, like in Robin Hobb’s Assassin’s Apprentice. YA novels may cover only a few hours or less in a whole chapter. One book may use all these methods in different chapters. And that may be just what that story needs to create an enjoyable pace for readers.
Chapters are composed of scenes, so to create well-paced chapters, it’s important to consider how you piece certain scenes and elements together.
Scenes involve 4 elements that most affect pacing: talking, thinking, movement, and time. So let’s look at some important pacing tactics for each.
Talking:
Tip 1: Emphasize dialogue
Dialogue is one of the most engaging ways to move a scene along. Stories are about people, and plot is created through conflict and changing dynamics between them. But make sure not to dump too much info through your dialogue. Try not to cover too many topics in one conversation to avoid making it feel drawn out.
Tip 2: Minimize monologues
Minimize monologues, except when it’s relevant to your character’s identity. Perhaps your character is a narcissist, a king, or a teacher – yeah, they’ll monologue a lot. And your other characters will probably endure it with mixed grace. That’s part of the story. Otherwise, keep the speeches to a minimum. Back and forth conversations are much more interesting.
Tip 3: Don’t overuse or underuse any one emotion
Readers want to laugh, and cry, and fume. Let us do all of those things through a variety of character interactions! It’s your job to take our emotions in hand and guide us through them.
Tip 4: Crowd control
Keep in mind how many characters you cram into one scene. Readers don’t want to sit through the Council of Elrond in every chapter.
Thinking:
Tip 1: Show don’t tell
If you can demonstrate what a character is thinking and feeling, rather than having them sit around musing about it, you probably should.
Tip 2: Build in quiet moments
Characters need time to themselves – don’t neglect quieter moments where they have to reflect upon their actions and circumstances. But be wary of having too many moments back-to-back where a character is just sitting around staring into space.
Movement:
Tip 1: Characters need to interact with their settings
Your character need to physically move and interact with each other and their surroundings. My favorite writing instructor liked to test this by “turning down the sound.” She also was an expert in theater.
She liked to say, if you were watching a scene in a movie or play, and you couldn’t hear the dialogue, would you be able to understand what was going on? A bunch of talking heads don’t make for good pacing. Changes in scenery, body language, and objects they can interact with can highlight different features of a character and offer new details for readers to fix on.
Imagine an argument that takes place between two characters in a sitting room. Compare that to one that starts in a castle bedroom before character A storms out. Character B must chase them down the hallway, lowering his voice as servants stare. They enter the kitchens, where character A finds something new to be angry about. The fight’s not actually about their lunch platter, but there’s all sorts of ammunition available. Which scene would you rather read?
Tip 2: Spread out action (battles, suspense)
If you’re writing a genre that involves actual physical conflicts, try to spread out your action scenes. Do you want to eat three dishes in a row that are dripping with hot sauce? Maybe. But most people would like a nice soft roll or a sip of a sparkling drink between them.
Incorporate reflection, emotional beats, and character development between action scenes to build upon the conflict characters have just faced.
Time:
Tip 1: Reader time
There are two types of time in a story – the time your characters experience, and the time your reader experiences. You need to be aware of both – readers don’t want to wait too long to get to the “good stuff,” but they need moments to breathe after high energy moments like deaths, fights, and intense exposition.
Tip 2: En media res
En media res (“in the middle of it”) refers to a technique where you start in the middle of the action. Introducing a character as they wake up in the morning and get ready for work can feel boring and predictable. Starting closer to a conflict – like showing how they respond to a car crash on the way to work, or to their boss barging into their office, can be a lot more compelling.
If you can start a chapter or scene later, or end it earlier, it’s a great idea to try it. However, be careful not to abuse this method. You risk wearing your reader out by never taking a break from the “go, go, go” pace.
Tip 3: Time skips
Time skips and flash backs are popular for a reason. If you don’t feel a compelling reason to show something on the page, try skipping it. Flash backs help you avoid having to hit every step in chronological order.
If you use multiple POV characters, this gets trickier. It could take a reader over a hundred pages to get back to someone, by which point a lot of time has passed, and the dramatic tension has faded.
Ask hard questions of your readers
Some elements of pacing are difficult to judge by yourself. It’s vital to get an outside perspective by asking your critique partners or beta readers specific questions like:
Does this dialogue drag on or feel confusing?
Are my chapters too long? Too short? Do they feel like they end in the right place?
Are you engaged with all my POV characters, or does switching perspectives between chapters frustrate you?
Consider this: if you removed an element of a chapter, would it change the overall story or characters? If not, why is it there? Keep in mind the emotional beats you want to hit in each scene and chapter. Cut away anything that distracts from or doesn’t help achieve that goal.
3. Micro-level Pacing
Micro pacing involves the sentence level. This is perhaps the hardest type of pacing to control, as it requires a greater mastery of sentence structure and the ability to vary your writing to reflect different emotions.
The sentences which make up an action scene should not read the same as those that describe scenery or piece together dialogue. Varying the length of paragraphs and sentences and selecting different word choices will change how your readers experience the energy of a scene.
Try reading your work out loud to get a sense of how sounds and transitions physically combine to create different effects.
Here are some questions to consider while writing at the sentence-level:
Tip 1: Sentence length
What is the average length of your sentences? Short or long? Full of multiple clauses and prepositional phrases, or simple?
Long, complex sentences can make your readers feel more leisurely and thoughtful, while clipped, straightforward sentences can make your readers feel urgency. The latter is great for action scenes!
Tip 2: Sentence variety
How many of your sentences start with the same word (He-, She-, The-)? Starting your sentences with the same structure can result in rather homogenous writing which, at worst, can become distractingly repetitive to your reader, or at best, fail to convey any change in emotion between moments.
Tip 3: Timely descriptions
Make sure to vary your descriptions depending on the type of scene. If a character has just arrived at a new city, a lengthy description is far more appropriate than during a quarrel or fight scene. Most people don’t stop to note architectural details when they’re dodging arrows or yelling at their lover.
A long description can bog down the story, and a missing description can confuse the reader. There is a time and a place for both.
Tip 4: Character-appropriate descriptions
You might be tempted to pause and describe an amazing bit of worldbuilding, but if your character could care less about their city’s waterworks, you should probably skip it. Even if your character is an engineer, if their best friend just died, they might not be dwelling on the scenery. Or their typically complex vocabulary might break down a little.
Sometimes pacing problems are caused not just by “what,” but by “when.” Just moving a description to a different place can often fix the issue completely!
Make sure your descriptions, down to the sentence level, fit your character and their emotions in each scene. Maintain a distinction between the word choices of the “narrator,” if you use one, and your POV character.
Tip 5: When to use exposition
Writers are told to “show, don’t tell,” but there is a time to tell. If you showed every second of an army marching, your story would have atrocious pacing. Sometimes, you need to summarize the actions of a group, past events, or time passing.
Long chunks of exposition get boring quickly, but you can convey a lot in a couple sentences. Examine how much time you dedicate to transitions such as shifts in time, location, or POV, and see if there are ways to trim this down.
You’ll be amazed how much the pace of your entire book improves if you trim a handful of mechanically busy sentences from every chapter!
Study Language Construction
In my experience, writers have the most difficulty employing strong pacing at the sentence level when it comes to action scenes. Writing Mastery has one of the most succinct and useful exercises on refining the pacing of a fight scene that I’ve encountered – check it out!
Reading poetry is another great way to push your understanding of language construction. Every word and arrangement in a poem is deliberate. Again, try reading a poem out loud to get a sense of how the sounds, positioning, and lengths of words and phrases can affect your experience as a reader.
Trust your instincts, but get feedback
Writing a story with great pacing requires time, effort, and good instincts. Sometimes, you’ll just have a “feeling” that a scene or draft isn’t quite right. Trust those instincts and keep experimenting.
Don’t do so in the dark, though. Critique partners and beta readers are invaluable when it comes to analyzing pacing. You may think you’ve achieved one effect, while your readers may experience another.
It’s important to find enough readers so you can determine what feedback is consistent, and what comes down to preference. It’s up to you to decide on your book’s pacing style. Stephen King’s books read much differently than dystopian YA, and both fully lean into their own unique tempo and energy.
Happy Writing!
Hi, I’m Caylah Coffeen, a freelance editor and marketer of sci-fi and fantasy books. I love reading and writing and am a follower of Jesus Christ.
I’ve worked for Monster Ivy Publishing and Eschler Editing, and am currently a weekly editor with Havok Publishing. Reach out to chat about books and publishing!
Thanks for stopping by my website! I hope you’ve found some helpful resources about reading, writing, and publishing. If you liked this article, here’s some more free content…
So my advice is to pick a consistent day/time and have an accountability partner or two to team up with. It’s satisfying to at least have some progress each week even in the middle of busy parenting and work!”
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